Pent up makeover
by Pinn Stripes
Summary: What if all his hanging out with Lydia was causing Beetlejuice to have pent up anger? what if that anger surfaced as its own entity? (New Chapters! reviews would make me ever so happy) YAY! I love my reviews! I adore you all!
1. Pent up make over

BeetleJuice or BeetleGuese?

Pent up ... make-over PART I

Jacques and Ginger walk out of the Roadhouse carrying stained boxes full of junk.

Ginger: With Beetlejuice livin all the way in Hermit Huts I'll be able to practice my dancing without any "constructive" criticism.

Jacques: I can not believe Be-attlejuice is moving out! I shall miss 'iz antics. He truly brought life into deez bones.

Ginger: Oh please, you've been prayin for this day to come since he moved in! We're lucky you didn't blow our cover when you practically begged to help him move his things out. Don't tell me you're getting all sentimental! You aren't backing outta our long awaited, and well planned party are you?

Jacques: 'ew am I kidding? I wouldn't postpone dis partee for de end of de Needareworld.

Jacques slammed the last box on top of the pile of heaping junk once known as BJ's putrid room, and with a soft moist squish the trial of packing BJ's things was done.

Jacques: Dere … all packed and readee to buggare off.

Just then, Doomy came roaring around the corner with Beetlejuice at the wheel. Doomy came to a screeching halt.

Doomy: Onk Onk! (Insert musical horn effect)

Beetlejuice got out of his possessed car and breathed in the horrid black exhaust.

Beetlejuice: Oh yeah! We still got it Doomster. Ok Lydz we're here.

Lydia crawled out of the Ghoulish car holding a paper bag.

Beetlejuice looked at the heap, then at Jacques, then at Ginger.

Beetlejuice: It's show time.

Ginger: OH MY! Lydia are you ok!

Ginger ran over to Lydia attempting to comfort her.

Beetlejuice: Oh yeah Lyds wasn't feelin great today so I thought she could use some fresh Neitherworld air (snort).

Ginger: The only THING this air doesn't affect is YOU Beetlejuice.

Lydia: (sniffle) Wow, you two sure got BJ packed quickly … AND organized.

Beetlejuice: Hey … you're right…

Just as Ginger and Jacques began to feel appreciated by Beetlejuice they were soon horribly shot down by his next remark.

BeetleJuice: We can't let the neighbors see this!

Beetlejuice began dumping all the boxes out into garbage bags and threw them all over the place.

Ginger & Jacques: Sigh.

Beetlejuice: A minute longer and I could have had my reputation tainted!

Lydia let out a giggle.

Beetlejuice: Speaking of… ugh (shiver) organized, did you find any-

Before Beetlejuice could finish his sentence Jacques handed a dirty jar filled with an assortment of bugs to BJ.

Beetlejuice: OH WOW! You filled my old toe-nail jar up with bugs! It must have taken you hours to find all these guys and trap'em in here!

Jacques: Actually, all we 'ad to do is dump your box of celebrity arm-pit hair into your toe-nail jar and left it open all day.

Beeltejuice: Awww stop, you're gonna get me all choked up.

Ginger: I'm going to go throw up and then practice my dancing. It was an annoyance living with you Beetlejuice goodbye.

Beetlejuice: Awwww stop.

Ginger expressed an emotionless face and walked into the Roadhouse.

Jacques attempted to fake a smile of gratitude.

Jacques: Oh! And we got a gift for you to Lydia!

Lydia: Oh Jacques, you shouldn't have, this isn't exactly a goodbye.

Jacques: Well with Be-attlejuice gone me and Gingare will be able to concentrate on our careers and will be very busy until we find anodare roommate.

Lydia: OH Wow! Ghost-hymers best selling book on the Neitherworlds' view of what's normal.

Jacques (whisper): It will 'elp you judge Be-atlejuice's be'ahvior

Beetlejuice: Cry' in shame.

Beetlejuice looked over his shoulder to investigate a familiar whistling to see that the monster across-the-street was doing his gardening. Beetlejuice walked across the street and walked behind the unsuspecting monster with a green smirk. Poopsie growled from her Mutt-house. Beetlejuice quickly poofed into the shape of a bathtub and smiled with his large green teeth. Poopsie whimpered and hid in the shadows of her Mutt-house.

M.A.T.S.: Beetlejuice, stop scaring my Poopsie!

Beetlejuice: Isn't it kinda pointless to have a dog if it can't fend off smoldering freaks like me? (Snort)

M.A.T.S.: Grrr. Beetle JERK! Ahem … What do you want?

Beetlejuice: I strutted my stripes over here to let you know that your flowery-ness and custom-shampoo you use won't be making my mornings so … flowery anymore.

M.A.T.S. looked up from his gardening and turned towards Beetlejuice.

M.A.T.S.: You mean you're movin on outta my hair like a Tick on fire?

Beetlejuice's shoulders sulked a little and he gave an un-amused and slightly insulted gaze.

Beetlejuice: Yeah, sure … I'm movin to Hermit Hut's.

M.A.T.S.: OH BEETLEJUICE! This is the NICEST thing ANYONE has ever done for me!

Beetlejuice's eyes twitched from the very thought of it. His skin almost turned green and his hair began to fade into a dead white.

Beetlejuice: Now why'd you have to go and say a thing like thaAAT!

Before Beetlejuice could finish the monster gave him a big fuzzy hug and lifted him off the ground.

Beetlejuice sprung out a hundred arms to push the monster away and screamed at the top of his lungs.

Beetlejuice: AAAAHHH! YUK! SO cuddly! That TEARS it! (BJ tore himself in half)

Beetlejuice glared over at Poopsie. And began to have a thought of such evil measure that he hadn't had in what seemed to be ages. Suddenly, he heard a voice from his head and time seemed to pause.

Voice: Come on, you know you want to… you've been DYIN to do it since you met the mutt. We'll show that Texan reject whose boss of this Neitherworld.

The sky grew dark and BJ's eyes seemed to glow a greenish-yellow as he smiled a sinister smile. Beetlejuice quickly transformed into a CAT-apult and launched Poopsie into the blood red sky.

Poopsie: YYYYIIIIiiiiiiiieeee!

Everyone could only watch as Poopsie was shot into the air like a novelty rocket. The monster's jaw was agape and his toothpick rolled into the back of his throat. He then coughed it up and ran towards his companion.

Beetlejuice: That was the single most refreshing deed I've done all day.

Poopsie then landed on the narrow highway near their homes.

Just then a TANKer truck came down the hill and right towards the little dog.

M.A.T.S.: POOPSIE LOOK OUT!

Poopsie looked up and jumped out of the way and right off the highway cliff.

Beetlejuice: Curses.

M.A.T.S.: Whew.

Then everyone realized Poopsie just jumped off a cliff.

All (but BJ): Poopsie!

Poopsie landed in the sand desert below the road.

Poopsie whimpered and got up. She tried to climb the walls, but her limp was keeping her from jumping onto little platforms formed within the cliffs.

Everyone looked at Beetlejuice with angry faces. Then the sky returned its normal color, and Beetlejuice seemed to snap out of his trance.

Beetlejuice looked at everyone.

BJ: Uh oh.

The monster ran over to the cliffs edge and began climbing down.

M.A.T.S.: I'll get ya Poopsie! And then I'm gonna FRY Beetlejuice's BRAIN on a skillet and FEED it to you!

Voice: Uh-OH.

BJ: Uh-OH. COME ON LYDZ! We gotta run!

Lydia: BEETLEJUICE! I can't believe you did that to that sweet creature!

BJ: SWEET!

Lydia: I'm not going anywhere until you make things right!

With that said she folded her arms.

BJ: But Babes! Some peoples' after-lives are in danger!

Lydia gave a careless glare.

BJ: OHH. Fine.

Beetlejuice floated over and as he leaned over to see the monster bringing up his dog-like friend, then he heard that voice again.

Voice: NOW's your chance to put that lovey-dovey beast on the line.

Beetlejuice thought about it but before he could hesitate, his arms turned into a line and fishing hook. They scooped the two hairy beasts up and dangled them over the dessert.

M.A.T.S: BEEETTLEJUUUICE!

Beetlejuice looked around confused, then over at Lydia.

Lydia: Beetlejuice what are you doing?

BJ (in a quiet voice addressed to himself): um, nothin … actually.

Suddenly Beetlejuice heard a cry that sent shivers down his spine.

Sandworm: RRReeeAAAAIIIRRRRGGGGH!

As the beast jumped out of the sand and opened its jaws Beetlejuice nearly dropped the monster and its pet into the worm's ghastly jaws.

BJ: YOW!

The worm snapped its jaws right under the monsters boots as Beetle juice lifted them higher into the air.

M.A.T.S.: AAAHHHH!

Poopsie: YIPE! YIPE! YIPE!

Beetlejuice withdrew an amused smile.

Voice: Now dangle them a bit.

BJ: ok …. HEY! Who keeps talking to me!

Just then Lydia grabbed his arms and reeled the monster and his dog in before the sandworm could lunge again.

M.A.T.S: thank you little lady Lydia.

After he bowed to Lydia, the monster smashed Beetlejuice's head into his body with just his yellow hair sticking out.

M.A.T.S.: I'd stay and pulverize you but Poopsie is a little sensitive and needs to recover. (In a cute voice) Doesn't he, oh yes he does awwww.

Beetlejuice: At least with my head smashed in I don't have to see him and his mutt get all cute.

The monster entered his house and made a phone call.

M.A.T.S.: We'll get that Beetlejuice won't we? (Cute voice) Yes we will!

Phone rings on other side of the line.

Lydia looked at BJ's head smashed in.

Lydia: Ok I guess that's good enough. Lets get you moved in I have school tomorrow. Ms. Shannon is having us do a portfolio on made-up animals.

BJ: MMF UUMMF FUMMLE MUFF?

Lydia looked over at BJ trying to fix his head and laughed.

Lydia: I never can stay mad at you when you use your Beetle charm.

BJ: WHTMMF VTTLEF CHUMMF?

Lydia: Ha-ha ha ha!

Meanwhile back at the Deetz home:

Delia: Lydia! Its time for dinner!

Delia called out like a robin singing into the morning.

She looked up the stairs at Lydia's room.

Delia: Lydia? Honey? Are you feeling any better?

No answer.

Charles: Aww poor pumpkin must be feeling awful.

Delia: I'll get something fixed up for her and take it up to her.

Just as her parents left the staircase, a bright flash lit up the upstairs hallway for just a second.

Lydia: What a sick day.

BJ: Well babes, I'll see ya tomorrow after school, unless you wanna be sick again.

Beetlejuice gave a sly wink.

Lydia: No thanx Beej, I have to do this project on a made up animal by tomorrow.

BJ: just pick something from the Neitherworld toots.

Lydia: Wow that was insightful coming from your part.

BJ: Don't get used to it.

Lydia let out a short laugh.

Lydia: Ok see you tomorrow Beetlejuice (Raising one eyebrow)…Beetlejuice BEETLEJUICE!

And with that Beetlejuice zapped out of sight.

Lydia began getting her art supplies out when Delia came into the room.

Delia: Well looks like you are feeling better. I made you some chicken soup!

Lydia: Thanx Delia, I think I'll be feeling better by tomorrow. I have an important project to do tonight.

Delia: Ok I won't disturb you dear. See you in the (In melodious tone) MMOOORNING!

Lydia rolled her eyes after Delia left the room.

Lydia: What to make. I could use something from the Neitherworld, but that wouldn't be quite original. Hmm. But a spin off of something from there could work.

Lydia worked through the night with ideas spouting everywhere.

Lydia: Finally finished.

Just then.

BJ: That looks like a mutated sandworm. I find it offensive.

Lydia turned to her mirror and saw Beetlejuice glaring through at her project.

Lydia: Good then Ms. Shannon will like it. It's a Sand-shark.

BJ: A what?

Lydia: I used an Outterworld name and mixed it with a Neitherworld design.

And I'm thinking of submitting these ones too.

Lydia pulled out a diorama portraying what looked like the Neitherworld deserts. Stacked with different versions of sandworm-like monsters.

Lydia: A Sand-shark, a Sand-leech, and a Sand-snake.

BJ: ugh, did you have to make them so big next to the sandworm?

Lydia: It's not like their real or anything BJ.

BJ: Still don't likem.

Lydia: Goodnight Beetlejuice.

BJ: Later babes.

Beetlejuice faded from sight. Lydia put her project next to her door and back-pack. She climbed in her bed and before she went to sleep, she glanced at her desert diorama.

Lydia: Still, they do look pretty cool. If BJ wasn't so afraid of sandworms I wonder if we'd be able to discover anything else in those abstract deserts.

With that said she blew out her last candle and went to sleep.

Meanwhile at Hermit Huts Apartments. (Hermit Huts Apartments are imbedded high into the sides of a series of cliffs above the Neitherworld deserts. With snaky narrow roads leading to each domicile.)

BJ: Pfft! Their just sculptures BJ no reason to fear the un-existent. Sandsharks humpf!

As Beetlejuice went to sleep he heard that voice again.

Voice: But imagine the fun we could have if we brought those sculptures to life during class, and made them life-size?

BJ: ….. Who is that? So familiar.

Voice: Don't tell me you've forgotten me? Has hanging out with that babe really made you so soft? I mean look at you! You have Frriiieends eewww!

I remember the good ole days when we actually terrorized the public. Some of the best times were over at the Maitlands.

BJ: Hmmm.

Beetlejuice looked around.

BJ: Where are you anyway? I don't recall having a sidekick.

Just then Beetlejuice's brain hopped out of his skull.

BJ: AAAAAHHHH! You! You got away once but you're stayin in my head for good this time!

BJ's Brain: Well unless you do something about your friendly behavior, I'm out.

BJ: Well we are in a new Neighborhood. We can MEAT the neighbors. Tomorrow.

BJ's Brain: That's a start.

And as easily as he slipped out, he slipped right back in Beetlejuice's head.

BJ: that explains a lot.

BJ's Brain: (Thinking) Sleep peacefully now for everything you know is going to change when I get a hold of it all. Mwah ha ha ha ha HA!

2 B continued … Next Pent up Make-over part II


	2. Pent up make over prt 2

BeetleJuice or BeetleGuese?

Pent up ... make-over PART II

The Nightmare begins

The next beautiful morning in Peaceful Pines, the birds were chirping and the sun was rising. A rooster could be faintly heard from the Deetz's kitchen.

Delia: gooood mooorning world! Lydia it's time to get ready for school!

Upstairs in what used to be an attic a dark hairy figure loomed about the shadows of an already sunless area. The lights flicked on and Lydia saw her mangled hair and smeared makeup in the reflection of the mirror.

Lydia: AAhh! Oh.

Delia decided to make breakfast while Lydia got ready and today Delia made her "artistic" rendition of French toast.

Lydia came walking down the stairs with her project in hand.

Charles: morning pumpkin. You did your hair differently today … got a big day planned?

Lydia: I have a presentation.

Delia: Here's your break (musically) faaast.

Charles: That's wonderful pumpkin!

Delia set the plate down in Lydia's spot at the table.

Lydia took a glance at the food as she sat down.

Lydia: … What is it?

Delia turned around and looked at Lydia with her usual vacant smile, then looked at the plate then back at Lydia.

Delia: Why it's French toast dear.

Lydia raised one eyebrow to the fork full of food.

Lydia: Thanks.

After placing a forced smile to Delia, Lydia took a bite of the food.

Delia smiled warmly and continued her scurrying.

Lydia (thinking): It IS French toast.

Charles: Hurry pumpkin you don't want to be late.

Lydia: have a good day you two.

Lydia left with a slightly hasty pace in her step.

After closing the door and leaving the drive way on her bike, Charles looked over at Delia.

Charles: Well it's nice to see her in good spirits.

Delia: I'm so happy to see her excited about showing her art!

Meanwhile…

Another orange skied morning in the Neitherworld. The Sandworms were roaring and the sun was Swirling. A rooster skeleton could be faintly heard from Beetlejuice's Studio Apartment.

BJ's Brain: Wake up you drooling moron!

BJ: What for?

BJ's Brain: Our new way of after-life!

BeetleJuice dragged his body up out of his new coffin bed and slugged over to the mirror. He reached over and turned on the lights. He saw that his hair was soft and shiny and his eyes weren't blood shot in the reflection of the mirror. Aside from his long hair he looked like his brother Donny.

BJ: AAAAAHHHhhhh! Oh, it's just me. Darn bed-head

BeetleJuice dumped his head in a jar of his own grease (hair gel) and sprayed some bug killer in his eyes. To get them blood shot.

BJ: Aaahhh. MUCH better.

BeetleJuice decided to hunt for breakfast while he let his hair get frizzie and moldy.

After a few roaches BeetleJuice came walking outside with his latest prank in hand.

BJ: Dumb-Dee-Dump-Dumb-Dumb. Hey Doomy, wanna have some fun today?

Doomie: MEEEP MEEEP!

Nearby a neighbor heard Doomie's honking and looked down from his apartment. He saw BeetleJuice packing bags full of knick-knacks into the backseat.

Donny: BIG BROTHER!

BeetleJuice turned around to see Donny coming at him with arms ready to hug.

Beetlejuice's eyes grew wide and his pupils shrunk. He quickly threw a vase full of rotted flowers at his little brother.

SMASH!

Donny looked over at the smashed vase against the cliff wall.

Donny: You always were the frisky one! We can hug later.

BJ (Whispering): Not on yer afterlife.

Donny: It's going to be SO nice to have you close by BeetleJuice!

Doomie: ONK ONK!

Donny: It's nice to see you too!

BJ: I'm kinda busy right now; could you come back when I'm not here?

Donny: uhHA HA! You're such a kidder!

BeetleJuice's eyes twitched a little. Then he heard his brain again.

BJ's Brain: let's give him one of our welcoming gifts.

BJ: HERE … Donny this is a little sumthin from me.

Donny opened the present and a striped snake latched onto Donny's face.

Donny (from inside the mouth): AWWW a new pet! How'd you know I wanted one? And he's so friendly.

BeetleJuice began to grow furious. But before he could act Donny thanked BeetleJuice (which made BJ cringe) and walked off.

Donny: Well I should go feed him now. Bye Big B!

BeetleJuice let his thoughts fume until Donny was out of sight.

As BeetleJuice finished stuffing the back seat full of prank presents, a familiar shadow rose behind him.

Lydia rode to school with a little black smile lighting up her already pale features. When Lydia arrived at school her only two friends Prudence and Bertha, welcomed her as they chained their bikes to the bike rack.

Prudence & Bertha: Good morning Lydia!

Bertha: I see you'll have an interesting presentation by the size of it.

Prudence: I can't wait to see it unveiled.

Lydia: Thanks I'm actually excited to show this one.

The three girls continued down the hall and into the class.

Ms. Shannon: AH. You girls are just in time! Take your seats please.

The last bell rang for class to begin.

Ms. Shannon: As you can see many of you have quite intricate presentations to show. So, since you all have been doing SO nicely this week, we will postpone the presentations until after classes are dismissed. I would like to show off your presentations to your fellow class-mates and your parents this evening. This will give you some extra time to touch them up or even finish them! So instead we will have free-read until the end of class today.

Class: YAY!

The students waved in excitement.

Clare Brewster looked over at Lydia and then her covered project.

Clare: So, is this another artistic monstrosity out of that twisted and fashionably ugly world you always make pictures of?

Lydia: Actually this is something a little different this time, CLARE.

Clare: Ooooh golly gosh! I wonder what kind of unrealistically demented things you made. MY presentation is going to be marvelous!

Prudence: And let me guess PINK?

Clare: Well! You got mouthy all of a sudden. Who taught you how to back talk, your calculator?

Prudence: Actually Clare, I was simply making an observation on your constant theme of everything in your eyes to be PINK.

Bertha: You are like a really repeatable Marbie doll.

Clare: Ru-Ru-Repeatable!

With a surprised and insulted gaze Clare Stormed off to her desk.

Lydia: Wow you two you really got her that time!

Prudence: I feel so … Rude!

Bertha: Like we broke the laws of physics!

Lydia: I'm so proud.

Clare: Ok girls. WE are going to get Lydia at the presentation in front of the whole town! Here's what we are going to do.

Prissy follower: You are SO outta control Clare! Tee hee!

Meanwhile BeetleJuice was just returning home from greeting all his new neighbors. And as he pulled up to his home he listened for a second.

He began to hear the terrified screams of his neighbors as they opened their gifts. He let out a satisfied chuckle and walked into his apartment.

That's when BeetleJuice noticed his home had been invaded and everything of his was opened and strewn about … some more.

BJ: That's funny I don't remember hiring a decorator.

He looked around a bit.

BJ: A good one at that.

He heard a noise coming from around the corner.

Scuzzo the clown was digging in BeetleJuice's room.

BJ: Hey! What are YOU doing here! And what are you doing to my place!

Scuzzo turned around un-startled.

BJ: I like it. (Snort)

Scuzzo: I'm trying to cheat!

BJ: Cheating? For what?

Scuzzo: The G.W.T.M contest!

BJ: The "ghost with the most" contests are this week?

Scuzzo: Yes! And I came by while you were leaving to see what you had planned this year! Obviously you lost your touch because you haven't even thought of anything! HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

BJ: Listen here Scuz-Bot! I have more ghost power in one of my scraggly hairs then you do in both of your big rubber shoes!

Scuzzo: Good! Cause if you and your whole scraggy head of hair show up at all this week, my big shoes will be waiting to kick you down to second place!

BJ: err.

Scuzzo: so long BeetleBUMB! AHAHAHAHEEHEEHEEHAAHAHA!

And with a honk from a horn he rode off on his unicycle.

BJ: This whole day has been nothing but a run-in with the people I hate the most! I need to see Lydia.

BeetleJuice walked over to the mirror and picked it back up and set it against the wall. He imagined Lydia for a second and then the mirror showed her room.

BJ: Empty? Oh yeah she's at-

BJ'S Brain: SCHOOL! The presentation! We gotta hurry!

BJ: Hey! We are just going to visit as BettyJuice got it? I won't let you ruin her one good day in the outer world!

BJ's Brain: Sorry to hear that.

BeetleJuice began to twitch.

BJ: Hey! What're you doin? AHHH! OUCh!

BeetleJuice held is head in pain. His body began to convulse and the sky grew a poisonous purple. His hair began to grow thicker and frizzier. His teeth began to sharpen and rot even more. His skin decayed just by a few years and began to show a few liver spots and veins. His nails darkened to a crimson red. He squeezed his eyes shut. And just as he felt like he was going to explode, the entire Neitherworld grew darker than any shade of black that anyone could imagine. Suddenly two yellow eyes filled with evil lit up and a green smile reflected off the darkness.

BeetleGuese: It's show time…

Lydia rode home with the actual intention of telling her parents about the school event happening that evening.

Charles was watching for birds when Lydia's face appeared magnified in front of the lenses.

Charles: AHHH! Oh. Lydia dear. You scared me.

Charles began to shake nervously.

Lydia: OH. Sorry dad.

Charles: Th-That's ok pumpkin. I'll be fine I just need some more c-coffe.

Charles refilled his mug and spilled a bit due to his shaking.

Charles: So, you're home quick. A good day then?

Lydia: Actually Ms. Shannon changed our presentation time. She wants to make it into something parents can come see.

Charles stopped in his thoughts and actions. And slowly brought his cup down from his chin.

Charles: You mean you want me AND Delia to come see this art show?

Lydia gave a modest smile.

Lydia: Would you be willing to come see some second class art from school?

Charles: Of course! We'd love to come! In fact why don't you invite your friend Betty along? Go tell your mother while I clean up.

Lydia: Actually … Dad, I would like to go freshen up before the show.

Charles: oh! Of course pumpkin. I'll tell her then.

With a sigh of relief Lydia walked up to her room.

As she got dressed into her favorite black outfit that she only wore to fancy dinners, she herd a voice.

BJ: Psst. Babes.

Lydia: Oh hi BeetleJuice! I was just about to invite you to my art show.

BJ: Oh, you wouldn't believe the horrors I suffered today Lydz. I just had to come visit you today.

Lydia: Awww that's so sweet of you.

BJ: So what say you and BettyJuice make this night interesting?

Little did Lydia know that the next three words she was about to say would change her life forever.

Lydia: BeetleJuice, BeetleJuice …

BeetleGuese gave a sneaky grin.

Lydia: BEETLEJUICE!

2 B continued… Next, The Freak show. Pent up makeover Part III


	3. Pent up make over prt 3

BeetleJuice or BeetleGuese?

Pent up ... make-over PART III

The freak Show

Charles: Lydia its time to go to the show!

Delia came bursting into the living room wearing a very bright dress consisting of blues and whites, and she wore a big gardening hat with a scarf draped over the top and tied under her chin. Charles looked at her with a surprised blank face just as Lydia came downstairs. Lydia began to blush in horror.

Lydia: Don't you think the Townsie mom-look is a bit much?

Delia: This is a BRIGHT and wondrous day for us all. I just wanted to show it and celebrate!

As Charles headed out to pack the trunk with the picnic supplies he over heard Delia's comment.

Charles: Well that's a swell idea. I'll go change into a white shirt.

Lydia rolled her eyes as she headed for the door. Just then the door bell rang. Delia jumped in front of Lydia and opened the door proudly as if to want to show her outfit off to the guest.

Delia: HELL-Oh. Who might you be?

BettyGuese: It's ME BettyJuice!

Delia: OH! Hello Betty! I didn't recognize you! Come in!

Lydia heard the conversation and her curiosity brought her to lean over from behind Delia. What she saw made her eyes open wide with surprise.

BettyGuese: HI Lydia! Long time no see!

"BettyJuice" was wearing a gothic school-girl outfit and besides her hair being black, it didn't resemble BeetleJuice's hair style at all. She was wearing black lipstick, a skull necklace, and her face wasn't the usual ghoulish blue. It was more like a "Lydia" white. BettyJuice was shorter as well. In all fairness BettyJuice looked like a best friend from out of Lydia's fondest dreams!

Lydia: HI.

As BettyGuese came in the door the whole Deetz family stood back in amazement.

Delia: Well. You certainly have changed.

Lydia: You're like a different person!

BettyGuese: I felt like I needed a drastic change of personality. And I figured why not try and fit in with my best friend, Lydia!

Charles: Well that sure was a thoughtful thing to do for Lydia! (Although she could have fixed her screechy voice)

Lydia: Yes…it was.

Lydia couldn't help but feel a little suspicious.

Lydia: Betty, could I see you for a second? Dad we'll be in the car in a moment.

Charles ok pumpkin we're ready when you are, but time's a tickin!

Lydia pulled BettyGuese aside.

Lydia: Ok I give, what are you after?

BettyGuese: I felt like becoming less conspicuous while we hung out from now on?

Lydia: Sounds smart enough. What are you up too?

BeetleGuese began to feel nervous.

BG (thinking): Man now I understand how BJ got so tamed.

BettyGuese: I figured if there's going to be any fun tonight no-one will be accusing the dirty odd-ball girl.

Lydia: Hmm. All right but keep your "fun" on the down-low.

BettyGuese gave Lydia a salute. Lydia then headed for the car. BettyGuese let a mischievous smile cross her cheeks.

On the way to the "school picnic and art show" BettyGuese explained her new way of life to be all thanks to Lydia and her new school instructor. This wasn't far from the truth.

The school parking lot was full and music and food was already bustling with patrons in the playground area.

Announcer: The school art presentations will be in one hour.

The Deetzs' and BettyGuese got out of the car and headed for the festivities.

Delia: Well, your teacher sure went out of her way to show off your little presentations!

BettyGuese (In BeetleGuese tone): I'll say.

Lydia: me and Betty will meet you two in an hour.

Charles: Ok pumpkin, here's some food money.

Lydia and BettyGuese headed for the Gymnasium while her parents got the picnic blanket set up.

Meanwhile in the Gymnasium.

Ms. Shannon: OH Lydia! Perfect! We're all here. Ok grab your projects and set them up outside in your designated areas and keep the curtain closed until you are called upon. You may have fifteen minutes to go get yourself something to eat. We will also be giving prizes to those whose projects fit into the designated categories.

Ms. Shannon pointed to a chart with her yard stick.

The chart read:

Realism

Detail

Believability

Originality

Showmanship

Clare read the chart then looked over in Lydia's direction.

Clare: Well, looks like we all know who the loser is going to be!

Lydia: Other than the fact that you're pointing me out; what are you talking about?

Clare: YOUR project is sure to be nothing but sheer nonsense. You might as well ask Ms. Shannon to fail you now.

With out warning BettyGuese butted in between the two girls.

BettyGuese (In BeetleGuese voice): Listen missy. Lydia has more talent in her one little camera button pushing finger! Then you have in your entire plastic body! If I were a pink festering virus like YOU… (I would have fed myself to the sandworms being so PINK)… uh, I would watch your back! Because sooner or later mother-nature is going to find a cure for what keeps you crawling around and make sure you shrivel like a dried up roach!

Ms. Shannon: Is there a problem here girls?

BettyGuese: Just a little competitive talk before the show.

BettyGuese gave her most innocent smile she could muster.

Ms. Shannon, repulsed by Betty's teeth ignored them and walked off.

Clare: Well then, may the best imaginary animal win. And too the looser, lets just say, I hope she likes to serve others.

Lydia shook Clare's hand.

Lydia: Deal.

BeetleGuese (Thinking): This gives me an even dirtier idea

Delia was enjoying the festivities, while Charles had spotted a rare bird on his list.

Charles: OH! A blue jay… I gotta get a closer look!

Delia ignoring his disappearance went on tasting things and looking at the crafts for sale in hopes to find something with "potential" and mangle it into her own creation.

Announcer: The Presentations are going to begin in a short while. Please take a seat and enjoy the show! There will be judging held at the end of the presentations. Thank you.

Delia: Oh I'm so excited! Charles you're going to miss the show! Charles?

Charles was no where in sight.

Delia: Must be in the men's room.

Without any more hesitation she found two empty seats and placed her purse on the other one for Charles.

Meanwhile, the girls had gone outside to their designated stands and closed their curtains.

Lydia: I'll be right back BJ I need to use the restroom. Just stay put and don't TOUCH anything.

BettyGuese: OK! Sheesh. I won't TOUCH anything heh heh.

BettyGuese watched Lydia go into the school. Then he looked over at Clare's Stand, to find no Clare.

BG: Hmm. This is perfect!

BettyGuese zapped Lydia's diorama. Then he poofed over to Clare's Project as a wasp, then, with his stinger zapped her project.

BG: Heh heh may the best animal win. I'm such a Snake, (Poofs into a snake)

in the grass.

BeetleGuese then slithered off into the back row of the chairs and sat down as BettyGuese, then poofed up a bag of Beetled-popped-corn.

Lydia walked up the grass hill to her stand. As she looked over to her parents spot she saw BettyGuese sitting in the back row.

BettyGuese then waved "hello" in an almost "goodbye" fashion un-noticeable to Lydia.

Lydia gave a short raise of hand to BettyGuese.

Lydia: What is he up too?

Lydia looked at her diorama. Nothing seemed wrong or changed. As she turned around to look at Betty, the Sand-worm toy (which she decided to add to the rest of the creatures) fell off of the poles which kept it propped up. But Lydia didn't notice.

Announcer: Ok let the presentations start! All students please stand in front of your curtains until you are called on. The first presentation is Bertha!

The crowd of 100 towns-folk clapped appropriately.

Bertha: My Imaginary animal that I documented is none other than the Computer Virus and its many species.

Clare, knowing she had adequate time fled into her curtain, and snuck over to Lydia's area. She then peeked over into the diorama she saw the one "sand-leech" toy on its side in the sand with no other toy creatures on their prop-sticks.

Clare (Whispering): What a shoddy diorama. She should have stuck with pictures.

She did not notice the holes that had been dug into the school-ground's grass below her feet.

Feeling there was nothing to ruin she snuck back to her own project and got in front of the curtain and smiled innocently. Meanwhile in Lydia's diorama, one of the sharp striped pointed rocks in the landscape (the sand-shark's fin) sunk into the sand, followed by the other camouflaged spikes belonging to the other creatures.

Announcer: Thank you Bertha! Next contestant will be Clare Brewster!

The crowd clapped

BettyGuese handed a note to the person in front of him. The person opened it and it read: "say theze wurdz! BeatleJoose BeatleJoose, BeatleJoose."

Person: BeetleJuice, BeetleJuice, BeetleJuice?

In a quick poof BG was gone unseen. The person, confused, turned around to ask what the note meant to find no one there.

Clare's dad: That's my girl! Pride of the town.

Clare: I, Clare Brewster, decided to mix two very beautiful fantasy creatures we all know and love together. But not in an ugly Frankenstein way like Lydia would have.

Crowd chuckles.

Clare: My animal is the Unicorn-Pegasus!

Lydia (Thinking): Real original name Clare, should have called it the Unisus or something.

Just as Clare opened her curtain a life-size Crystal blue Pegasus with a see-through golden horn on its forehead and lightly pink feathered wings reared up in a familiar horse-like pose and spread it's wings open to a full 17ft. The entire spectacle seemed like it was in slow motion to everyone around. Then the mighty creature whinnied and with its hind legs, leapt up and galloped into the air flapping its pink wings in magnificence. As it (still in slow motion) began to fly in front of the sun, with everyone still starring with mouths agape, a rumble from under the soil shook the entire school grounds. From under the grassy lawn a long worm-like creature leapt up towards the sun and snatched the Uni-Pegasus right out of the dawning sky.

Everyone began to panic. As they scurried for their vehicles, the sand worm looked down at the crowd drawn by their frantic noises. As he honed in on the crowd's movements the bloodied wings of the Uni-Pegusus began to grow limp in between the beasts lips. Before his mighty roar the Sand-worm swallowed its victim wanting more mortal blood.

Clare freaked out and began screaming. And then she was grabbed by one of her dad's bodyguards and taken into the limo.

Lydia, still standing at her curtain and looking into the sky confused at what was happening, suddenly remembered her diorama. She tore the curtain open and saw that the "toys" had all disappeared into the soil.

Lydia: BEETLEJUICE!

Lydia looked around for Betty and saw no one.

Lydia thought to herself.

Lydia: Well of course he wouldn't be sticking around here if there's a sand-worm!

So behind her curtain she said

Lydia: BeetleJuice, BeetleJuice, BeetleJuice!

Lydia was zapped into the neither world in front of BG's new place.

And with a face so angry it could freeze hell, she stormed right in.

Lydia: BEETLEJUICE!

BeetleGuese was sitting in his lazy-boy chair watching the Outterworld news covering the spectacle.

BG: You gotta get a look at this rampage Babes!

Lydia: I don't need to look, I saw it! I thought I said don't touch anything?

BG: I didn't touch a thing. But I zapped a couple of dioramas. Heh heh.

Lydia: BeetleJuice! There are people's lives being attacked out there!

BG: Yeah, just like old times.

Lydia stared at him for a moment in amazement, then over at the T.V.

The scene showed people running for the parking-lot. Then the Sand-snake twice the worms size, coiled most of the cars up crushing them.

Lydia: DAD! AND DELIA! BeetleJuice you are coming with me to fix this!

BG was already starring back at the news cast.

BG: AAAAAHH HA HA HA! Whoa! I should be taping this!

Lydia grabbed his wrist and said the words.

Lydia: BeetleJuice, BeetleJuice, BEETLEJUICE!

Suddenly they found themselves in the middle of the street. A giant fin came ripping towards them tearing the road down the middle.

BG: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!

BeetleGuese poofed into a helpless baby and sucked his thumb.

Lydia picked him up and darted towards the grass.

Lydia: BeetleJuice, what caused you to do this!

BG: Honestly?

Just then the Sand-worm slithered from behind them casting a long shadow over the huddled duo.

The Sand-worm gave a green grin and lunged for them.

Lydia pulled BeetleGuese out of the way and rolled under a picnic table.

Lydia: you haven't quite been yourself since that day with Poopsie. What's goin on BJ?

BG: It's the best prank the Neitherworld has seen since my rampage at the Maitland's.

Lydia: This is all about the Neitherworld Ghost with the most contests? Have you gone insane? Look at this mess!

They both watched as the Sand-leech sucked the life from a tree.

Meanwhile, Charles was following the blue jay unaware of the rampage.

Charles: Hello little Jay jay, don't worry I just want to get a picture of your beautiful wing-span. Charles pulled out his camera. When he took his aim he saw the Sand-worm chewing on the branch that the bird had been resting on.

Charles began to convulse and twitch with nervousness. But his fear of being spotted kept him from making any sudden movements. As the monster chewed its meal it looked over at Charles, Charles instantly fainted. The Sandworm leaned over and licked his face. Then hesitated to eat him thinking he was dead, and since the beasts were addicted to the new mortal blood, it was not interested in Charles. Instead it slithered over him and chased a station wagon. Meanwhile, Delia was on the back of the rampaging Sand-shark screaming her lungs out, she was latched onto its large striped dorsal fin for fear she would fall off and be crushed upon the uprooted gravel on the sides of its body as it tore down the highway of Peaceful Pines.

Lydia: We have to get these things back into the Neitherworld.

BG: They aren't from the Neitherworld…

Lydia: Oh, true, well you brought them to life. So think of something.

BG: Um, how about I leave, and YOU stay here and figure something out.

Lydia was not amused.

Lydia: You can't go anywhere unless I say your name.

Lydia gave a smirk.

BG: On the contrary, I am merely here for the fun, BeetleJuice is the one bound by your words.

Lydia became confused. Then the sky darkened and BeetleGuese returned to his BeetleJuice state.

BJ: Hey Babes.

Lydia: So, let me guess, you have no idea what's going on!

BJ: Um.

BeetleJuice looked around at the surroundings.

BJ: Um, you wanted me to come watch a holocaust?

Lydia: Something's going on and before we figure it out we are going to put these creatures into the Neitherworld.

BeetleJuice let a look of fear and confusion cross his gaze at Lydia.

Lydia: Well, for lack of a better plan.

BJ: Ok well I'm deathly afraid of all of them and you have no powers, we're doomed. Well that was an easy plan let's go.

Lydia: can you shrink them back to toys?

BeetleJuice thought as he gawked at the Sand snake swallowing a school bus.

Lydia: BEETLEJUICE!

Out of instinct Lydia pushed BeetleJuice out from under the bench.

He rolled right into a standing position catching the glare of the Sand snake.

Sand-snake: HIIIiiiisssth!

BeetleJuice's legs froze up, he tried to run but his frozen legs snapped in half causing him to fall to the ground. The Sand snake lowered its face next to BeetleJuice's and used its tongue to smell him a few times. Just as BeetleJuice was about to turn himself into a turkey dinner to make it easier for the Sand snake, it slithered right over him to Lydia completely uninterested in BJ.

BeetleJuice: Hey!

BeetleJuice stomped on its tail.

Sand-snake: SSSSrrroooaaarrrrsssstthh!

The ugly striped serpent reared its head back to BeetleJuice.

BeetleJuice: what? am I not good enough for you anymore?

The serpent ignored him and turned back to sniff out Lydia again.

BeetleJuice: Oh I see! Goin all Atkins on me now huh?

The Sand snake snatched the bench and threw it over the school building.

But, before the beast could lunge for Lydia.

BeetleJuice: HEY!

The snake looked over at BeetleJuice finally annoyed. But when it looked down to sneer at BJ it noticed a large pink and purple striped figure. It reared its head up following the slender shape of this beautiful snaky pattern.

FemaleBJ-snake: Get a load of these maracas big boy!

BeetleJuice lifted his tail equipped with two large maracas and slammed it against the Sand snakes jaw knocking the beast out cold. BeetleJuice then poofed back into himself and helped Lydia up.

Lydia: WOW! BeetleJuice! How'd you over come your fear?

BJ: Fear? That was just a big snake! I like Snakes. I wasn't afraid for a second. Pffft!

Lydia: uh huh. Well then I guess he's next.

Lydia pointed to the Sandworm slowly coming their way.

BeetleJuice's eyes sunk into his skull and then popped out as he screamed.

BeetleJuice: SANDWORM!

Lydia: Oh please the snake was twice the size!

Lydia took a few steps back.

BeetleJuice put up his fists all brave like.

BJ: All right, you bait gone bad! Put up your dukes!

The Sand worm looked away from Lydia and roared at BeetleJuice. Just then, BeetleJuice's Fists deflated and turned to dust.

BJ: Heh heh heh. I uh, been meaning to fix those.

The Overgrown worm pushed BJ aside with its tail.

Lydia: BeetleJuice!

Lydia picked up a rock and threw it at the worm.

Clunk.

The Sandworm focused on where the rock hit his head and bounced off.

Sand-worm: RRuurr?

Uncrossing its eyes it snarled back at Lydia.

Lydia: Nice wormy worm.

Suddenly, a large shadow loomed over the worm from behind.

The monster twisted its coils to see a large striped seagull glaring down at it.

BJ-Gull: Um, Sorry shark-bait, but no-one messes with my Lydz! Sqwak.

Sand-worm: Gulp.

And with one swift peck the Sand worm was out for the count.

BJ poofed back to him self.

Delia: aaaaaaAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhh!

The Sand shark had made its way back towards the school with Delia still roosted to its fin.

Lydia covered her mouth in amazement as she watched her step mother get paraded around town on the back of a sixty foot monstrosity like a cheap decoration.

BJ: Hmm this one's a little tricky.

Lydia: Turn into a big hook or something!

BJ: Lydz I can't turn into and eighty foot hook. The se-gull bit stretched out my pants.

BeetleJuice looked around for some inspiration. And then noticed a school book that had been tossed with the rubble that was once the library titled "Moby Dick"

BJ: HMMmm.

BeetleJuice then poofed into a Captain Ahab look-a-like, and rode on top of a crushed convertible which drug behind the shark in the rubble like a boat on the waves.

BJ: Um a vast! Ye stupid fish! (What? Not like I had time to actually READ the book!)

BeetleJuice then harpooned the giant flesh-starved creation.

Just then the shark stopped in its tracks.

BJ: Wow that was easy.

Delia finally stopped screaming.

Then the shark let out a horrible shrieky roar and turned around to face BeetleJuice. Just then a news helicopter came zooming by to investigate.

The Sand shark leapt up into the sky and crunched the propelling vehicle like an empty pop can. And with a few chomps it devoured the helicopter then looked back down at BeetleJuice. BeetleJuice started sprinting for Lydia in a desperate attempt to run away. He grabbed Lydia, put her over his shoulders, and ran as fast as one can in high heeled boots. The shark hesitated for a second giving them some running room. Then Lydia lifted her head up to see what was going on.

Sand-shark- BBBrrrooooOOAAAAARRRRGGGHH!

The leviathan leapt forward and began tearing through the streets again but aiming for BJ.

Delia: aaaaAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh!

BJ: How close his he babes?

Lydia looked up to see five-foot teeth chomping down about ten feet behind them and closing in.

Lydia: Objects in mirror are NOT closer than they appear!

BJ (thinking): Come on stupid brain you got me into this now get US out!

(Cut-scene to BJ's brain sitting in a lazy boy watching the shark chase BeetleJuice.)

BJ's Brain: Awe man this is the part where the miracle happens and everyone is saved….BORING! (flips channels)

BJ: What a head-ache. (snort)

BeetleJuice Poofed into a large atomic lizard.

BeetleZilla: OK you sour sardine!

Delia looked up at BeetleZilla.

Delia: AAAAHHHHHHHH!

BeetleZilla: If I had that woman riding on my back I'd be cranky to. (snort)

The Sand Shark reared up to its full height Towering into the sky and ending up to be twice as tall as BeetleZilla.

BeetleZilla: COME ON LYDZ! THIS thing has to have SOME weakness! Give a ghoul a break!

The two titans began to exchange blows.

Lydia: I made all the weaknesses pretty logical.

BeetleZilla: He's sixty feet tall and full of teeth! I can't become BeetleZilla M.D.D.!

Lydia: he's like a shark! But normal sharks can't survive on land!

BeetleZilla: In that case go get me 13 million glasses of water!

Lydia: drag him too the Lake!

The shark then bit right into BeetleZilla's tail.

BeetleZilla: YOUCH!

BJ tried to pull him off but the shark would not budge.

BeetleZilla: Fine! You just made dragging your scaly butt to the lake easier for me!

Meanwhile Charles, finally awake from passing out, got up and looked around at the destruction that took place while he napped like a ninny. Every thing was quiet and there was barely any sunlight left gleaming off of the horizon.

Charles: Lydia?

Then he glanced over to where the school picnic was.

Charles: Delia?

He could hear something rummaging in the garbage cans nearby. As he glared into the darkness he squinted his eyes at an attempt to separate the moving figure from the dark shadows that concealed it.

Charles walked closer hoping to find out what happened earlier to cause such havoc.

Charles: Hello?

The dark figure backed out from behind the garbage cans and began moving towards Charles. As it came into the light, Charles' face grew pale.

Charles: What the?

As the Sand leech approached it opened its narrow mouth ready to suck the life from Charles Deetz.

Charles: HAHAHAHAHAHA!

The Leech reared up in confusion and turned its head in curiosity. Charles continued to laugh.

Charles: I finally snapped! All my stress has gotten the best of me! All of those hours I spent watching birds was all in vain! For all I know you're Delia trying to calm me down because I disrupted the school picnic when I finally went off the deep end. All this destruction is a mental metaphor of how I view my life!

Charles then looked at the big striped slug and opened his arms out as if to engage in a hug.

Charles: Delia, I just want to tell you how much I appreciate you coming into my life and helping me raise Lydia.

Sand-leech: BBlurrble?

The sand leech began to back up as Charles approached with his arms opened wide.

Charles: I know I haven't always supported your art, but I love that you have something to express yourself with.

The leech then tripped over an overturned car.

Charles: I know I may sound crazy, and what I seem to say is probably coming out as lunatic ranting. But I will always love you.

Charles grabbed the big bug and gave it a smooch right on its big slimy lips.

The leech dug into the ground yelping like a dog with its tail on fire.

Charles: Oh, now she has left me. I'm all alone and crazy.

Lydia: Dad?

Charles: Lydia? You're not a bug!

Lydia gave Charles a confused look.

Lydia: Are you feeling ok?

Charles: Oh yes. I've never felt better now that I'm crazy. I just envisioned Delia as a fat slug monster and she ran away.

An awkward silence fell between Lydia and Charles.

Lydia: Dad, Delia is with BettyJuice.

Charles: What?

Lydia: You single handedly chased that leech away.

Charles: I did? I'm not crazy?

Lydia gave her dad a warm smile. And then Charles fainted again.

A little while later Lydia had finally went back to where BJ was last seen wrestling the Shark, Dragging her dad behind her.

BJ: Find yer pops?

Lydia: Yeah but he fainted after I told him he wasn't crazy.

Lydia looked over at the sand shark which was slumped on the parking-lot pavement fast asleep with his mouth open.

Lydia: what happened here?

BJ: I guess I wore him out.

Lydia: Good lets get him into the Nietherworld dessert.

BJ: Sorry toots, but I'm too pooped to poop. I need to charge my juice.

Lydia: What if it gets up again?

BJ: Then you say the magic words and we go back to the Nietherworld and never come back.

Suddenly a black ominous cloud came from the sharks gaping mouth.

BJ: You gave him poisonous gas breath too? Geez Lydz, one would think you secretly want to destroy the world creating a creature like that.

Lydia: I didn't give him Poison gas anything.

Lydia looked closer at the cloud. It seemed to move like a school of fish.

Lydia: That must be his cleaners!

BeetleJuice stared blankly at Lydia.

Lydia: It's these little bat guys that live inside him. They come out when the shark is drained of energy since it never sleeps, to feed on the stuff between his teeth and his scaly hide. And any other source of food nearby. This gives them a sort of radiant energy, and then they kind of glow. So they go back inside when they are done feeding, and they plant their fangs into the shark's insides and they pump him full of that access energy to give him life.

BeetleJuice continued to stare blankly.

Lydia: he's so big and uses up so much energy that he becomes immobile when he's tired. So, these bat things actually refuel him so he can stay alive. I designed the shark to eat garbage and decaying things in the Nietherworld desserts or garbage dumps. And since garbage isn't very nutritional to a living thing, I designed these bat-like things to give him life sustaining nutrients so he can continue to clean garbage from the Nietherworld.

BJ: You, have WAY to much time on your hands Lydz. Besides, I LIKE the garbage. It makes my morning so much more meaningful.

Lydia: Well I didn't intend for him to actually exist! I needed to give my creatures an ecological purpose for my project. YOU'RE the one who gave these things life.

BJ: About that. Technically it was me but actually it wasn't.

Lydia: how does a ghost like you get possessed?

BJ: I wasn't possessed! Remember way back in the day when I tried to kill your parents and marry you?

Lydia: I try to forget.

BJ: Ouch. Anyway, that part of me had been pushed back into my brain and has developed some pent up anger. Now the old "me" is trying to take over. "He" even spells his name differently. But I can't spell or say that name either since it's still my name. Maybe the Maitlands still have my old flyer.

Just then a little bat creature dropped out of the night sky, and landed in front of BeetleJuice.

Bat: (Bat-ish sounds) squeak?

BJ: What do you want? Food? Forget it.

The bat thing gave BJ a curious look as if it was trying to understand.

BJ: Look! I'm empty I got Nothin for you!

BeetleJuice opened his jacket showing the bat he had nothing.

Lydia: Awwwe he's so cute!

The little bat thing looked at Lydia with its big shiny eyes like a lost puppy.

BJ: All the more reason we shouldn't trust it.

Lydia: Here you go.

Lydia handed the creature a cookie she got at the picnic and watched him munch down on it.

BJ: LYDZ? You just helped "Moby Dick" over there get more stamina!

Lydia: Oops.

BJ: Great I'll have to become BeetleKong soon since BeetleZilla is tired.

Lydia: Maybe we can use these guys to our advantage.

Just then a larger bat-thing chomped on BeetleJuice's hair thinking he was a decaying corpse and started dragging him off.

BJ: AAAHHH! Whys he attacking me?

Lydia: He thinks you're a rotting corpse!

BJ: WOW these guys have good taste.

Lydia grabbed a piece of broken side-walk and chucked it at the bat-creature, knocking it out cold. BeetleJuice then dropped to the ground.

BJ: OUCH!

Lydia: Eeww, looks like the majority of these guys aren't all so cuddly looking as the last one. Come to think of it I didn't even come up with a design for these guys. So how did the other BeetleGuese know what they looked like?

BJ: He doesn't. See, I can give inanimate things life. And I guess some strange power brought about the rules and talents of your creatures into reality.

Lydia: Can't you just re-take the life you gave them?

BJ: If every irresponsible ghoul could take life, then there wouldn't be much of a job for Ole Grim Reaper now would there?

Lydia: Good point. Well made. So how do we stop thousands of bats from feeding a sixty-foot fish?

BJ: I can hold them off if you can go get the other two creatures knocked out.

Lydia: Let's see we got the worm and the snake. So now we need the leech and the piranha. I haven't even seen the piranha at all yet! How am I going to find these guys BJ?

BJ: Follow the screams. (Snort)

BeetleJuice turned into a giant piece of duct-tape and covered the shark's mouth.

BJ: Hurry babes!

Lydia tried to think of all the things she had written about the monsters, looking for some way to lure them back to BJ.

Lydia: OK let's see, the leech will be drawn to anything alive or any large amount of unnatural liquid. The piranha will be drawn to humid swampy areas teaming with viruses, and nuclear waste dumps. So either I go to the Soda-Cola factory to find the sand leech, or the vast sewers of Peaceful Pines for the sand piranha.

Lydia looked down the street and could see the soda factory and then looked down at a man-hole lid.

Lydia: Hmm ok which creature possesses the most threat? The sand leech is slow and will be sucking soda for hours or the sand piranha which eats any flesh or germ infested thing it can find and then multiplies?

Lydia ran to the abandoned gas station nearby and took a crow bar from the shelf. With out hesitation she ran to the nearest sewer lid and opened it up.

Lydia listened for any unusual sounds as she crept down the ladder. As she reached the bottom she looked at the sewer surroundings.

Lydia: This is going to take forever. If only Percy was a dog and not a cat…or a coward. I bet Poopsie could fi...POOPSIE!

Meanwhile.

BJ: And you just never know when to expect it. First I'm enjoying life and then I'm in line to get my death certificate. You of course are an exception being a big dumb animal.

Lydia: Pant-pant. BeetleJuice! We have to go to the Nietherworld!

BJ: But if I let go then this guy will get his Three thousand course meal!

Lydia: I need Poopsie to track the sand beasts for me!

BJ: Can't you get Percy to do it?

Lydia: Percy couldn't catch a dead mouse. He's afraid of everything that casts a shadow.

BeetleJuice glanced behind himself and looked at the sand shark's shadow that loomed across the entire parking-lot.

BJ: You make a persuasive argument.

Just then a shadow crept up behind Lydia.

BJ: Uh Lydz. I think we can cancel Poopsie.

Lydia turned around to see the sand piranha floating towards her flipping its little light-bulbed antenna in her direction as if to lure her to his mouth.

After she realized it wasn't going to directly attack her, she grabbed a nearby picnic blanket and covered the beasts head.

BJ: Now bash in its skull!

Lydia: With what?

The fanged fish chomped up the blanket and puffed up as big as it could get. (About 4 feet high)

It then opened is razor filled mouth and backed Lydia up against a tree.

Lydia: BeetleJuice!

Bat: Squeeeeeeeeek! Screeech!

The cute little bat-creature Lydia fed earlier attached itself to the freakish fish and began draining its stamina and life force nearly reducing it to a colorless carcass.

Sand-piranha: RRrreeaarrrgggle.

The fish dropped to the ground barley moving.

Bat: Squeek!

Lydia: Thank you! He's cute and courageous.

BeetleJuice: Sounds like a description of what could be my "evil twin"

Lydia gave a little giggle.

Lydia: You are the evil twin.

Bat Horde: screech screech!

Lydia: Here they come.

The little bat began to glow along with the others but he stayed standing on the ground next to Lydia.

BJ: AAAAAHHHHHH! They're in my HAIR, they're in my HAIR!

The bat things began to claw at BeetleJuice and some tried ramming into him. BJ: we'll just tire them out and then go get that leech.

Then the bats flew off into the sky and made a U-turn as if to do one giant charge for BeetleJuice.

BJ: Uh oh.

Instead of beating into him they all latched onto his outstretched body.

After a brief silence they all lifted their heads and began making a soft squeak as if to sing.

BJ: Something you haven't told me Lydz?

Lydia: This is new to me.

A loud rumble came from inside the shark. And then a loud muffled roar also from inside. After a moment a large bat-like head filled with fangs pushed up against BeetleJuice's tape-ish shaped body and tried to reach out to the other bats.

BJ: I can't hold on much longer Lydia!

The littler bats began to pull on BeetleJuice while the large bat inside pushed.

BJ: How long do we have to get the leech before Jaws here refuels completely?

Lydia: Um I don't know.

BJ: YOU"RE THE CREATOR! MAKE SOMETHING UP! AND IT WILL BECOME REAL (hopefully)!

Lydia: Um, judging the amount of bats and how much they can inject into him. Oh, about an hour?

BJ: That's it? You could have said something more like until day break!

Lydia: Sorry! I was being logical!

BeetleJuice let go of the shark's lip and nose and darted for Lydia while the bat creatures piled in the cave-like mouth.

Lydia: OK take me to the Soda-Cola factory.

BeetleJuice transformed into a big stripped bat.

Lydia: A bat?

BJ: It seems to be the theme for tonight.

BeetleJuice looked down at the little bat creature who did not join his colony.

BJ: What're you lookin at?

The bat creature stared longingly at BeetleJuice.

BJ: Whatever.

BeetleJuice lifted off and took Lydia to the factory.

Looking around a bit confused the bat thing decided to follow Lydia instead of flying back into the mouth. He then looked around and injected the access nutrients, which was meant to feed the shark, into a damaged teddy bear. He stopped glowing and lifted himself off the ground and made his way towards BeetleJuice.

As Lydia rode on BeetleJuice's back, she looked behind her at the sand sharks limp body. After a few glances she noticed parts of its body beginning to glow the same white-ish green as the bats were.

Lydia: That must be the injection. It's kind of a romantic glow in the darkness. If only that glow didn't mean our doom, I'd like to stop and watch it light up the night sky.

Just then her area of focus was changed after the little bat ascended in front of her view of the shark.

Lydia: OH! Hello little guy. You want to follow us?

Bat: squeak!

Lydia: Hahaha! Ok common you can sit on my lap.

The little bat glided over to her and rested his little wings.

Bat: Squee!

BJ: Stupid cute animal. (Look at me I'm a cute little bat who feeds a giant shark whose going to eat us all but that's ok! Cause Lydia likes me!)

Lydia: Are you talking to yourself?

BJ: It just so happens, I am! (Not like I get a choice. You and your dirty pet ride on my back while I do all the work around here.)

Lydia: Ok we're here! Land by the main entrance! We'll sneak around to the back by the Soda tanks.

Meanwhile Delia and Charles Deetz walked down a crumbles road towards their house.

Charles: Do you think we caused this?

Delia: What on earth do you mean?

Charles: Just like we conjured those ghosts up in our previous house. Do you think we opened some gate to hell and now the whole town is haunted and filled with demons?

Delia: Well, I suppose it's a possibility. But Lydia was "friends" with the gho- the Maitlands. I think she would know of something like that.

Charles: Unless they're evil and don't plan on telling Lydia and then engulfing Peaceful Pines for their own sick zombie habits.

Delia: I think you're concentrating too deeply on this Charles. How bout some hot cocoa and your favorite movie?

Charles: Yeah that sounds nice. What about Lydia!

Delia: from what I saw Lydia can handle herself.

Delia continued to comfort and walk Charles home like a nurse to a mental patient.

BJ: He's so gelatinous looking then from before.

Lydia: Shh! It's all that soda pop.

Bat: sqwee!

BJ&Lydia: Shhhhhh!

The little bat tucked his ears back knowing his error.

Sand-leech: Blurbsss?

Lydia: I think he heard us.

Lydia: got any Ideas Beej?

Lydia looked over at BeetleJuice who was in the shape of manual juicer for oranges.

Lydia: Gross.

BJ: How about this?

BeetleJuice changed into a syringe.

Lydia: Hmm I don't know.

BJ: Ok then why don't we just send in Bitey here. He took care of the last beast.

Lydia: Ok. That might work.

Lydia kneeled down to the bat creature.

Lydia: Will you go bite that leech for us?

The bat cocked his head curiously.

Lydia motioned biting and then pointed to the Leech.

The little bat thing lifted himself into the air and flew right towards the leech.

Bat: Sqweek!

Sand-leech: BBlllraabbbgg!

The leech was too slow for the little bat. The bat creature darted around the leech until it finally grew dizzy then he sunk his big fangs into it and began draining. After a few moments the bat became filled with liquid and his body expanded into a sphere. He fell to the ground and rolled around until he hit a wall. He tried to get up but all he could do was wiggle his tiny hands and legs.

Bat: Sqwee!

The little bat began to glow again.

This caught the attention of the leech that was back to its normal size.

The bat thing tried to waddle away as fast as it could.

Lydia: Hey!

The leech turned its attention to Lydia.

Lydia: Whoa, Um, Heh heh.

The leech began to crawler towards her.

Lydia: Beetle-

BJ: Hey blood sucker! Over here!

The leech again, averted its attention.

BJ: Hope you were thinking of STICKING around!

BeetleJuice transformed into a spider and ensnared the leech in a web.

BeetleJuice: Hop on Lydz!

Lydia: Good thing I like spiders. Come on little guy!

The little bat waddled over to Lydia who picked him up.

With a self-induced "Hee Ya!" BeetleJuice was out the door on all eight of his candy cane-stripped legs.

Upon arriving to where the other beasts were lying unconscious, BeetleJuice transformed into a fork-lift and piled the other monsters next to the regenerating shark.

BJ: Let's get this train a movin!

BeetleJuice transformed into a demonic zoo train and loaded the beasts up.

BJ: Next stop, the Nietherworld!

Lydia and the bat boarded BeetleJuice's passenger car which was decorated in beetle pattern on the inside with black and red stripes on the carpet.

BJ: Please be sure to double check your seat-belts and make sure they are broken and or installed incorrectly to maximize your riding experience. Thanks for choosing Beetle Engine 13. In case of emergency please stand in an upright position and flail your arms and legs outside the window as you panic. Enjoy your trip.

Bat: Squeak?

Lydia: Don't worry he's just joking. BeetleJuice, BeetleJuice, BEETLEJUICE!

As the Beetle train slowly began to move forward on its striped train tracks, a menacing black and purple portal opened up like a gate to a forsaken realm.

The little bloated bat covered his eyes and tucked his ears back.

Charles looked out the window as he watched his movie and drank his cocoa to see a horrible portal opening up on the horizon.

Charles: I was right.

With that he fainted again.

The Beetle train began to gain speed down the hill right into the portal. As soon as they were inside the downhill ride became a vertical drop on some narrow train tracks.

BJ: AAHHH HA HA HAAA!

Lydia clinched onto her stomach while the bat got stuck between the cushions.

Suddenly the drop went up diagonally then back down. Then twisted in several crooked loops. Finally they hit another portal bringing them into the Nietherworld outskirts.

BJ: We hope you have enjoyed your blood curdling experience. Thank you for choosing Beetle engine 13.

Lydia: You make "nightmare" Doomy seem like a joy-ride.

BJ: I aim to please.

The bat rolled out of the passenger car.

Bat: BBBUUUUUUUURRRRRPPPPP!

The bat burped up all the soda and caused the narrow snaky road to shake.

BJ: Hey, that was pretty good. Maybe that little bat isn't so bad after all.

Bat: Squee!

Lydia: Ok let's dump these guys out here. And be rid of them. I designed them for the Nietherworld so they should do fine here.

BeetleJuice tipped his cargo hold over. They all watched as the beasts fell into the vast dessert.

Lydia: Let's go before that shark wakes up.

BJ: Over and outta here!

BeetleJuice transported them to his apartment.

BJ: Guess I should take you home.

Lydia: What are we going to do about Peaceful Pines? It's nearly in ruins!

BJ: I'll call a couple of ghoul friends. And let you know tomorrow.

Lydia nodded and said the magic words.

Lydia, BeetleJuice and the bat thing stood in front of her house. Then looked behind them at Peaceful Pines below. Several Buildings were on fie and the sound of sirens filled the valley. Several helicopters flew overhead.

Lydia: Oh boy.

BeetleJuice let out a tear as he gazed over the landscape.  
BJ: It's so…beautiful.

Lydia rolled her eyes.

Lydia turned around and headed for the door.

BJ: What about this bitey thing?

Lydia turned again and looked at the bat thing. The bat gave her its best sad puppy dog look.

Lydia: Well I can't keep him here. Delia might turn him into a monstrosity of art and dad would faint every time he saw it. Take him home with you. You could use a roommate.

BJ: Bunk with this fuzzy bundle of joy? I have a reputation to uphold!

Just then the bat hiccupped and bit into the garbage can injecting all of the glowing substance he had into the garbage container. The garbage can began to shake and sprouted four curly wiry legs and some teeth in the top lid and walked off spewing garbage everywhere.

Bat: Urp, Hiccup!

BJ: On second thought maybe I could use a little beast around the house.

Lydia: Well you'll have to name him.

BJ: Hmmmm. hadn't thought of that yet.

Lydia: I'm going to bed. See you tomorrow Beej.

BJ: Night Lydz.

Lydia: YAAWwwnn. BeetleJuice, BeetleJuice, BeetleJuice.

BeetleJuice Disappeared with a cloud of smoke.

Lydia dragged herself up to bed.

Lydia closed her door and got into her spider web night gown.

Lydia: What a day. I wonder if I'll get an A.

Meanwhile in a big white mansion.

Clare was strapped to her bed in a straight jacket and her hair was all frizzy. She stayed calm and alone in her room.

She had officially freaked out at the school picnic and would not calm down so she had been tied down to her bed for lack of a better way to make sure she didn't hurt herself.

She calmly thought to herself.

Clare: Lydia had to have something to do with this. That thing looked like it came right out of her diorama. I'll expose her as the devil worshiper she SO is! She ruined my exhibit! She ruined my perfect day! She ruined my perfect life! She ruined MY HAIR!

Suddenly a nurse busted in and gave Clare some morphine.

Back at the picnic.

Bertha: Prudence. Did you see all of that?

Prudence: I witnessed the collision of the supernatural with the logical world of man.

Bertha: We could have been killed.

Prudence: We are so small and insignificant in this life that we were not noticed among the masses.

Bertha: Lydia was in the middle of every aspect. Those monsters looked like the worm things she always makes at school.

Prudence: Perhaps her creative pictures have been of real living creatures this entire time.

Bertha: Coool.

The two friends stood and watched the morning sun bathe the nightmare-ish destruction with a new light as they took in and accepted what had happened to their once peaceful town.

Bertha: I really feel like having a bagel.

Next… Ruxpin runaway.


	4. Rupin runaway

Ruxpin Runaway

Bitey's Mistake

Charles: … Pumpkin … wake up sweetie.

Lydia: Huh? … Dad?

Lydia tried to concentrate on her father's facial expression in a half asleep slump.

Lydia: What's wrong?

Charles: Um, well, besides the fact that we need to talk, there are a bunch of FBI agents checking houses. So you need to look, as normal as you can.

Charles left the room trying to stay as calm as possible.

Lydia: And here I thought wishing it was all a dream would work.

Lydia slid out of bed and headed for the shower.

Lydia: On the plus side I'm not getting ready for school.

Lydia wrapped a towel around her, and turned on the shower.

Delia glided across the kitchen like a hummingbird in mating season trying to make a "We are a perfect family" breakfast. (Like in the cereal commercials)

Delia: Oh Charles! Don't act so nervous! You shake like you have a dirty secret to hide. We had nothing to do with "IT". So stop worrying.

Charles: Sorry, it may be the thought that Lydia is Queen of the Damned that's got me so jittery.

Delia: I think you're over doing it with your random theories. You've been her father all of her life, can you imagine her controlling the dead?

Delia gave him a discerning gaze.

Charles imagined Lydia at age five opening Christmas presents in pink jamies.

Delia: Well?

Charles: No.

Delia skittered back on to her trajectory in the kitchen.

Charles, still unsure of his answer leaned back in his chair and looked up the stairs at Lydia's bedroom door.

Lydia passed behind her father.

Lydia: Morning.  
Charles: AAHH!

The break of silence made Charles loose his balance and fall back in his chair.

Lydia: You ok?

Charles: … yes

A knock came at the door.

Charles screamed and leaped onto his feet.

Delia: - Charles, please! -

Delia answered the door like one of the Stepford wives.

Delia: GOOD MORNING!

The two agents didn't even react.

Agent#: Ma'm we are with the FBI and have warrant to investigate the area and any residence within the area in order to follow up on the events of yesterday afternoon.

Delia: WELL DO COME IN! YOU MUST BE GETTING SO WORN OUT FROM ALL THIS EFFORT TO PROTECT OUR LOVELY TOWN! PLEASE COME REFRESH YOURSELVES WITH A LITTLE BREAKFAST!

Lydia smacked her forehead with embarrassment

Agent#2: Why thank you so much Ma'm. We could use a bite to eat after a long morning, May we ask you a couple of questions as well?

Delia: WELL OF COURSE! ANYTHING TO HELP!

Delia led the men into the kitchen where an overzealous meal had been prepared.

Charles attempted to give a steady wave hello.

After a little eating, the men began to ask their questions.

Agent#2: Where were you all at 6pm?

Delia: We went to attend the school picnic to see Lydia's presentation.

The two men glanced at Charles and Lydia through their sunglasses.

Lydia gave a little smile. Charles gave a nervous nod with a quirky smile.

Agent#1: Were you present when the alleged "monsters" appeared?

Delia: Yes, it came right out of the ground behind Lydia.

Agent#2 glanced over at Lydia suspiciously.

Lydia: (In best acting voice) It was the most horrifying moment in my life. I thought I was going to die.

Agent#1: How did you all escape?

Delia: Well, I scurried around looking for Charles, I thought maybe he went to the car, but, there was a big snake in the parking lot. Of course Charles hadn't actually sat down with me at the picnic; in fact I don't know where he ran off to before the show.

The two agents looked at Charles waiting for a reply.

Charles nearly choked on his words.

Charles: I saw a Blue jay; and being a bird watcher, I decided to get a closer look and followed it to the park. That's when the tall purple worm took a bite of the tree my bird was in. Then I guess I blacked out.

Agent#2: Have you ever seen these things before? Any other sightings you know of?

Delia: Well, no. Do you know what they are?

Agents: We are trying to figure that out.

Agent#: Did any of you see where the creatures went?

The family looked at each other.

Deetz Family: Nope. No.

The two agents wiped their lips with their napkins and stood up.

Agents: Thank you for your time and hospitality, here is our card in case you remember anything. Please be sure to contact us with anything else you can tell us.

Delia: GOODLUCK ON YOUR INVESTIGATION!

She slowly closed the door as they walked down the street.

Charles immediately fainted.

Delia: Oh Charles.

Lydia: Wow. I better go call Betty and see if she's ok.

Delia: OH MY YES! You do that, and I'll help your father.

Lydia walked up to her room.

Lydia: Whew.

She closed the door behind her then noticed a teddy bear sitting on her bed.

Lydia: I don't believe I've seen you before.

She picked the bear up causing it to make squeaky noises.

Lydia: Hmm.

Lydia then smirked as she glanced over at the mirror.

Lydia: Beetlejuice, if you think giving me this creepy toy will make this all go away then you don't know me very well.

No response.

Lydia: Beetljuice? Huh.

A shadow formed behind her looming closer to her as it grew to its full size. It reached out to pull her back when Lydia suddenly turned around.

Lydia: Beetlejuice. You know that never works on me.

Beetlejuice stood in a fancy pose wearing a black and grey stripped tuxedo.

Lydia: What's the occasion?

BJ: Well I thought I could spruce up for a day like this.

Lydia: A day like what?

BJ: It's not every millennium you get to have a day like this.

Lydia: A day LIKE WHAT!

BJ: Yesterday caused a rip in the "wall" that separates our two worlds! Not to mention OTHER worlds!

Lydia: We can't just go play while my world huddles in a corner!

Beetlejuice put a finger to her lips.

BJ: Ah AH! We won't be going to play. Instead we'll be going to other dimensions to find someone to assist us in reassembling your reality.

Lydia: You lost me.

BJ: We get to go play in other worlds!

Lydia: I thought you said we weren't going there to play?

BJ: That's ridiculous why would the ghost with the most turn down a chance to add another victory to his tally in the "Ghost with the Most" contest?

Lydia: What about my world?

BJ: Simple, we find a way to convince everyone within the entire area that they were all hallucinating during a hurricane.

Lydia: Plausible yet impossible. Very much like our friendship.

Beetlejuice stared blankly at Lydia.

BJ: Just say the words.

Lydia: Beetlejuice Beetlejuice BEETLEJUICE!

They appeared in the middle of Beetlejuice's living room.

Lydia: AAWW MAN! What's that smell!

BJ: Bitey and me are real buds now.

Beetlejuice whiffed the air.

BJ: AWwww. I love the smell of wet animal fur.

Lydia: This is worse then that.

BJ: He has other talents. (Snort)

Bitey came waddling out of the bathroom his fur was an unhealthy grey.

Bitey: (Burp!) Squee! (Hack) (Cough)

Bitey coughed up a few soda cans and some of Beetlejuice's junk mail.

BJ: He'll eat anything!

Lydia: I don't think he's meant to eat that kind of stuff ALL of the time. He seems kinda…

Bitey face planted into a pile of garbage lying in the hallway.

Bitey: Squgg.

Lydia: Sick.

BJ: I feed him bugs too.

Lydia: Beetlejuice, you are the only one in the Neither world that can have a diet like yours. Bitey is meant for large portions of living flesh, or dead. But, mostly things considered edible.

Beetlejuice starred blankly again.

Lydia: As in human edible.

BJ: Oh.

Lydia picked Bitey up and wrapped him in her sweater she had worn to breakfast.

Lydia: Let's get you something to eat.

Charles sat in his chair and picked up the news paper. On the front page it read "Suspicious man hides daughter of the damned."

Charles: AAHHHHH!

Delia: Chalres! Wake up!

Charles: Huh what?

Delia: You were having another nightmare.

Charles looked at his surroundings and noticed the news paper still on his desk.

Charles: Whew.

As he picked it up he slowly turned it around. The front page read "Mysterious creatures run havoc at picnic."

Charles looked up not knowing if he should feel relieved.

Delia leaned back into his study.

Delia: I'm going to go see if any of the stores are open today. Did you need anything while I'm out?

Charles: A crucifix.

Delia lowered her eye brows.

Delia: Sarcasm won't help you Charles.

With that said she glided out the front door. Charles looked out the window as she swept across from his view.

Delia: Well today seems to be normal enough.

Delia continued to walk down the hill as the shopping center came into view. Cars were parking and people walked calmly in and out of the various stores.

Delia smiled and quickened her pace. From behind her she could hear a faint banging of some sort. She stopped, then, quickly turned around. Nothing was in sight. She continued her happy steps then heard it again getting closer. Instead of looking again she sped up. It got closer then stopped. She sped up some more. It got closer then stopped again. She finally turned around almost angry. No one was in sight but an overfilled garbage can that sat across the street to her right. She turned as if to continue walking. The banging started again. When she turned around she saw the garbage can walking around banging its lid up and down spilling garbage everywhere. When it approached a new garbage can it swallowed the garbage in it and continued down the street.

Delia could only watch with her mouth half way open until it stopped. She continued to walk slowly hoping not to get its attention. She glanced over at it once in a while to make sure she wasn't seeing things. The garbage can and her walked parallel down the street a good distance without stopping. She finally got back to her normal pace completely ignoring the garbage can. Just then it stopped again. This startled her and caused her to stop again as well. She slowly turned her head to the garbage can. Delia noticed it wasn't next to a garbage can this time. Her eyes widened as she looked down at her feet to see two knocked down garbage cans. She looked back up at the "walking" garbage can. It reared up and started chomping in her direction.

Delia: AAAHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh!

Charles put the paper down as his stomach rumbled.

Charles: Hmm a doughnut and some cocoa will put that fire out.

He walked into the kitchen and saw a teddy bear on the doughnut box.

Charles starred at it for a moment. Then he made some hot cocoa.

Charles: Hello Mr. Bear! Can I have a doughnut?

He lifted the toy off the box and set it on the table.

Charles: Why thank you Mr. Bear.

Charles took the doughnut into the study and sat down. After a few bites he looked around.

Charles: Where's my?

Glancing into the kitchen he saw the bear with the cup of cocoa sitting in between its legs. He got up out of his chair and walked back into the kitchen.

Charles: Almost forgot my Hot Chocolate.

Charles winked at the bear and walked back into the study.

Charles: I'm so skittish about being alone that I'm talking to a toy.

Charles heard a squeak under his feet.

Charles: OH! Sorry Mr. Bear; didn't see you there. heh heh.

Charles bent over and picked the toy up.

Charles: Clumsy me.

Charles set the bear on his desk.

After his snack and some of the sports page, Charles looked around making sure no one was around.

Charles: Cigar time.

He bent the news paper in half and saw the teddy bear sitting on the cigar box.

Charles raised one eyebrow to the toy as it faced blankly and motionless in his direction. Charles smiled warmly.

Charles: You're always right where I need to go aren't you?

Charles moved the toy over to the other side of the desk and took a cigar out of the box.

Charles: Now where's my…?

Charles looked slowly to his left and in the toy's lap rested his-

Charles: Lighter.

A bead of sweat ran down his forehead.

Charles: Heh heh, thanks again Mr.Bear. You can stop that now.

No response.

Charles: Oh who am I kidding! I'm getting all worked up over a toy!

He grabbed the teddy bear and tossed it behind him.

Charles: Out of sight out of mind.

Charles lifted the news paper back up to his face. As he turned to the next page he felt like someone was watching him. He quickly looked on his desk to see nothing but his open box of cigars.

Charles: I'm loosing it. Maybe another doughnut and some of the funnies will calm my nerves.

He put the news paper down neatly on his desk and went through the swinging door to the kitchen.

Charles stopped in his tracks when he saw the teddy bear sitting on the doughnut box again.

Charles: …help.

Meanwhile in the Neither world.

Lydia watched as Bitey the bat choked down on more food than two eyes could look at on one table. Beetlejuice sulked as he thought about the bill.

BJ: We REALLY need to come up with an alternate way of feeding that garbage disposal.

Lydia tried to hold in her giggle.

Lydia: But HEEZ SOOE KUTE!

Beetlejuice held his head as if to have a headache.

Bitey: (burp)

As soon as he was full Bitey began to glow. After a quick hiccup Bitey bit into the table. The table rumbled and grew a mouth in the middle then the seats began to transform into tentacles. Lydia and Beetlejuice dove onto the linoleum. The table began eating all of the nearby dishes.

BJ: Hmmmm….

BJ's Brain: that gives me another idea for my next prank for the G W T M contest!

BJ: Well time to go dimension jumping.

Lydia: You make it sound easy.

BJ: Should it be hard?

As soon as they were outside Lydia noticed that there was literally a tear in the fabric of the dimensions. A large whole that revealed the identity of the other world was wide open for anyone to traipse in at will. It was like looking into a mirror and being able to walk right in.

Lydia: Should have guessed.

The three of them hopped in Doomy and drove right in.

Lydia: So, is this an alternate world or alternate Neither world?

BJ: Um… (Looking around for a moment) both?

Lydia: So what are we looking for?

BJ: We need someone who can alter the past and change images in order to hypnotize all who witnessed the events into thinking it was all a hurricane or something.

Lydia: And who would have that kind of power?

BJ: I'm not positive but I'm sure someone does.

Lydia: Beetlejuice!

BJ: Well my guess would be the Eldest. He's the oldest supernatural being within the 3 dimensions.

Lydia: Oh. Do you know where this guy is?

BJ: As a matter of fact, no… I don't.

Later…

Lydia: BJ, are we going in circles?

BJ: Nonsense we have been going in a straight line this whole time. In fact there haven't been any turns. Hmm. Maybe we should pull over. Doomster, pull over.

Doomy: Beep! Meep

Beetlejuice got out and headed into the nearest building.

Lydia got out and asked the nearest person.

Lydia: Do you know where I can find the eldest.

The person turned around and had the face of a sandworm.

BJ: AAAHHHHHhhhh! SANDWORMS!

Beetlejuice grabbed Lydia and jumped into the driver's seat.

Lydia: Beetle-

VVRRROOOOOMMMmmmm.

BJ: you should have seen it Lydz! The WHOLE place was FILLED with'em!

Lydia: BJ. Look.

Lydia pointed to an ominous object blocking their way.

As the object got closer the sandworm-ish people began screaming.

BJ: Woah.

A large striped worm with a very familiar face loomed into the city and started terrorizing the town's folk.

Lydia: THAT THING LOOKS LIKE, YOU!

BJ: Hmm. Somethins not right. This seems sorta familiar actually.

WormBJ: That'll teach ya to eat me Haaha ha ha ha!

They both stared blankly as the Beetlejuice worm devoured the worm people.

Then suddenly everything faded into a blank terrain.

Lydia: What happened? Where are we now?

They stood on a flat grey landscape that looked like it was made out of some sort of metal.

BJ: OH yeah, that was a dream I had. We must be in dream land!

Lydia: Is that good?

Beetlejuice shrugged.

As they took a few more steps the scenery changed into Lydia's Neighborhood.

Charles: Good morning pumpkin!

Lyida: Hi Da-

LYDIA: Hey Daddy!

The other Lydia walked right through Lydia and hugged her dad.

BJ: Whoa. Who's the babe?

Lydia sulked in embarrassment.

Lydia: Me.

BJ: Your dad seems…healthy.

The dream Lydia was dressed in casual kaki business clothes. And Charles was in comfortable gardening clothes.

Charles: I can't believe you're getting married today!

BJ: Married? Lydia, get married? HA HA HA HAAH! I wonder what poor sucker you have picked as your dream guy. (snort)

Charles: Oh and here comes the man of the hour!

A fancy red sports car parked in the drive-way.

As the door swung open…

Charles: Speak of the devil!

BJ: This outta be good.

Beetlejuice turned around with a smug smile, waiting to make his first crack at her dream guy.

Charles: BeetleGuyse!

Beetlejuice's eyes widened and his pupils shrunk. His mouth slowly jarred open.

Dream BJ: It's Beetlejuice Mr. Deetz.

The dream Beetlejuice was a little taller slimmer and a tad cleaner, dressed for a wedding in a roughish pin striped suit and top hat.

Lydia hid herself behind her arms attempting to cover her blushing.

BJ: This must be some HORRIBLE nightmare that I had! I probably don't remember it 'cause I was traumatized! The bright sunshine, a happy Charles, Lydia all successful! Truly a dream demon was haunting me this night!

Dream Lydia: You should settle down yourself dad. Find a nice girl who likes birds.

Charles: Maybe you're right pumpkin.

BJ: Wait. A dream with no Delia would be a good thing. AH HA! This IS your dream Lydz!

Lydia hung her head.

Lydia: It's pretty stupid…huh?

BJ: Well, of-

Beetlejuice looked at what he could see of Lydia's face. A tear ran down her cheek. He turned his gaze to the now happy couple. They embraced each other and then kissed. Then held hands, and walked inside.

Beetlejuice raised her face gently and looked her in the eyes.

BJ: It's not all that bad.

Lydia whipped her tears and smiled.

Lydia: Really?

Voice: As a matter of fact…

BJ: Uh oh.

BJ's Brain popped out of his head.

BG: It's PERFECT!

The living brain scrambled towards the house and opened the door. He pulled out the Dream Beetlejuice and jumped in its head.

Suddenly the dream land took on a more sinister form as it reshaped itself into a demented version of the Neither World. Lightning struck as Beetleguese became one with the dream juice.

Beetleguese: That's much more like it!

Lydia: This answers a few questions.

Bitey peeked out from behind the back seat of Doomy. He saw the Evil BJ and then turned into a round ball out of fear.

Lydia: How is it you could touch the Beetlejuice in my dream?

BG: Lets just say I have been dreaming of this moment.

Hew grew long arms and shot them in their direction.

BG: ha HAH!

Mr. Mcurter was sitting on his porch rocking back and forth enjoying the new day. Mr. Mcurter was hard of hearing and nearly blind. He had no idea of the goings on that happened the day before. He heard a faint screaming coming from down the street.

Delia: AAAAHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhh!

Delia sat in the "mouth" of the rampaging trash can covered in all kinds of garbage.

Mr. Mcurter: I figured she was a nut job. "Modern art" Humf!

As Delia began to calm down she looked ahead over her.

The walking trash bin was headed for the dumpster behind the mall.

Delia: AAAAAHHHHHHHHhhh!

Charles: Ok. THIS is not happening.. It's all coincidence.

Charles approached the toy cautiously and picked it up with his thumb and index finger.

Charles: I'll just put it in Lydia's room. That'll get my mind off of it.

The ascent up the stairs seemed like it went on forever as Charles carefully carried the bear who could only stare right back at him.

Charles: Whoever manufactures this thing was a horror scholar.

Lydia's bedroom door creaked open and Charles poked his head in making sure there was no undead roaming in her room.

Charles: Whew. Now we'll just set you down on the bed. And let Lydia put you away where you belong.

Charles stood back up and backed out of the room never taking his eyes off of the vacant gaze of the teddy bear.

Charles shut the door and turned toward the stairs.

Charles: (shivers) BLUH! I feel like I've been touching spiders. Bleck!

The un-nerved man headed for his study to relax.

Charles: (Sigh)! Nice comfy lazy boy. Hmm, I wonder where Lydia ran off to.

Charles reached for the remote and began flipping through the channels.

Charles: What's taking Delia so long?

Meanwhile, at the city dump.

Delia: AAAAAHHHHHHhhhhh!

Charles: Oh well. I could use the quiet time for a good nap.

He leaned back and folded the paper over his eyes.

(Grumble)

Charles: Of course…I finally get relaxed, and then nature calls.

Charles got up and headed through the kitchen. Just then he began to hear some sort of shuffling sound. And then, from up stairs.

( Thump, pat pat pat pat.)

Charles: ………

(THUD! DDrrrRRAAAAAGGGgggg Crack!)

Charles followed the sound of the dragging to the stair well where it seemed to have hit the door knob on Lydia's door causing the wood to crack a bit.

Charles' eyes widened as he watched the door knob shaking back and forth.

Charles: …this isn't real. I'm just seeing things out of stress.

Charles watched the door knob twist some more and built up a little courage,

Charles: HA! I locked the door! I'm on to your games Mr. Bear! You can't get out and terrorize MY afternoon! NO SIR!

Suddenly a Large kitchen knife jutted its way through the wood near the handle.

Charles: Ack!

The knife began to repeatedly stab the wood attempting to make a passage way.

Charles looked down to realize it was too late to go to the bathroom. He looked back up at Lydia's door to see the knife still cutting its way through and ran for the garage.

Charles: This is just a dream! Come on Delia, WAKE ME UP!

Charles was so jittery that he couldn't even get the keys in the ignition.

He could hear footsteps on the hood of the car making their way to the windshield.

As he tried to start the car he looked outside the windshield waiting to see that creepy blank faced toy peer through the glass.

Just as he imagined, the teddy bear peeked in the car upside down as it dangled from the rooftop wielding Delia's biggest kitchen knife. It smiled widely with its little stitched mouth full of tiny pointed teeth. Then it slid down the glass and ran to the edge of the hood.

Charles froze in fear.

The animated toy smiled again and lifted the hood of the green station wagon up and slipped under and closed it.

Charles could only listen to the silence and wait for the bear to appear again.

Charles: …

Squinting his eyes he focused his best on not fainting.

To be continued … watch the news


	5. Watch the news

Ruxpin Runaway

Watch the news. Part one

Lydia and Beetlejuice were helpless in dream land and at the mercy of BeetleGuese.

Lydia: What exactly is it you want?

BeetleGuese grew long spider legs out of his back and crawled over to Lydia with an insulted sneer.

BG: What makes you think I want to tell YOU of all people?

Before she could utter a word BeetleGuese Slammed her mouth shut with and iron plate.

BeetleGuese thought for a second.

BG: Y'know with your mouth like that, I might be able put up with you. HA HA HA HAAAH!

Bj; HEY! You can't treat her like that! I'll SQUASH you like a bug!

Beetlejuice waited for his powers to kick in at his remark, sadly nothing happened.

BG: It truly IS too late for you my friend. I thought maybe I could change you back to your old self, but I was wrong, this girl has been like a slowly aging virus weakening you the longer you exposed yourself to her.

Beetlejuice's face grew purple then red and his hair almost appeared to burst into flames as he shook with anger.

BG: It's clear to me that I'll have to take your place as ghost with the most.

Beetlejuice's expression softened as he gave in to the mentally disrupting lecture given to him by his other half.

BeetleGuese smirked in delight as he witnessed Beetlejuice's spirit break and fold.

BG: I knew you'd see it my way sooner or later. But you obviously picked your time to be later. Sadly I'm afraid your decision is too late to save you or your, ahem, friend. (Shivers in disgust)

Bj: So, what ARE you going to do with us?

BG: I'll be dumping you in the FAR reaches of the Neither world desserts. SURELY something out there will find you and eat you.

BeetleGuese scurried over to Lydia.

BG: And as for this little thing. I'll make sure she never meddles with the Neither world ever again. Sadly I'll have to help you in a sense, by cleaning up the memories of that prize winning rampage I caused in Peaceful Pines.

Doomy: HONK HONK! AROOGA!

BG: And as for that little car of yours.

Doomy hung from a strand of silk webbing.

BeetleGuese zapped Doomy with his powers turning Doomy back into an inanimate vehicle.

Bj: DOOMY!

BeetleGuese spun Beetlejuice and Lydia in a web and put them in the back seat of the car formerly known as Doomy and drove back into the Neither world.

Meanwhile on a garbage barge, Delia had scrambled out of the relentless trash eating can's mouth.  
She stood next to it as it devoured pile after pile of the filth surrounding them, took a deep breath and screamed in its direction at the top of her lungs.

Delia's shoulders hung in frustration as the can ignored her as if she was not there.

Delia looked around for something she could float back to town on. Just then she saw some duct tape hanging in the window of the cockpit where a stubby scruffy man was driving the barge. Delia nonchalantly climbed in with him grabbed the tape and looked at him with a glare that would send anyone into submission. The barge slowed to a stop and after a few minutes began moving again but back in the direction of town. Delia had taped the man's hands and feet and was now driving the barge with a furious expression on her face. The barge driver had said nothing to her or given her any trouble while she taped him down for fear of his life.

As soon as she docked she grabbed the tape again.

Man: what else are you going to do with me?

Delia slowly swung her head over to look at him.

Man: Sorry, I'll be good.

Delia marched back over to the walking can, stood behind it and pulled on the tape as if to tape the can down to something.

Delia: Now it's my turn.

Mr. Mcurter had just come out side for a soothing cigar break when something caught his attention. Delia sat on top of the walking garbage can holding what appeared to be reigns. The lid had been taped shut and a pillow placed on top.

Mr. Mcurter: Get a horse lady!

Delia pulled on the reigns stopping her obedient trash can. Slowly dismounted and walked over to the old man. Delia snatched his cigar, took a puff, and blew the smoke in his face.

Delia took a banana peel from her hair, placed the cigar inside, then put the butt of the peel in his mouth.

Delia: I call this piece: "Going senile"

She hoped back on her steed and snapped the reigns causing the can to continue up the hill.

Mr. Mcurter watched her as his cigar-peel, still sitting in his mouth, smoldered.

Charles opened his eyes and did not see or hear anything. Just as he began to think he was imagining it all, the kitchen knife jutted through the car hood.

Charles: AHk!

The car radio turned on and began playing the theme from "Jaws".

Charles looked back at the knife cutting its way to the windshield like a menacing shark fin in the water.

Charles: OH MY GOD!

Charles scrambled around fumbling the car door handle trying to open it.

The knife withdrew and began to stab from behind the radio.

Charles flopped onto the garage cement as the car door flung open.

Charles: OW!

He quickly got up on all fours and scurried over to a corner armed with a broom. Charles heard pitter patter from the other side of the car.

The bear slowly revealed itself. And with a high pitched and gargled voice.

Undead Ruxpin: Tee hee hee hee hee hee haa haa haa.

It grinned with its crooked pointy teeth as it lifted the knife and slowly approached Charles maniacally.

Charles pointed his mighty broom of power at the small evil toy.

The bear began swinging its knife lopping off pieces of the broom handle as he made his way closer to the jittering man hiding in the dark corner.

Charles: STAY AWAY! … (Voice cracking) I'm WARNING YOU!

Undead Ruxpin: Bleh heh heh hee hee!

The bear showed his teeth and began making a chomping motion with his mouth.

Undead Ruxpin: NAH NAH NAH!

BeetleGuese drove for miles while his two victims slept from the weakening powers of the webbing. For a day and night he drove on the long and winding roads of the Neither world out lands.

BG: Wake up my pretties, were finally here.

Bj: where's here?

BeetleGuese spread his arms out.

BG: The Neither world out lands!

Beetlejuice and Lydia looked around at the seemingly endless dessert and the narrow road that disappeared on the horizon.

BG: This is where we part ways kiddies.

Bj: You MONSTER!

BG: Flattery can't save you now Beetlebooze.

Bj: You've gone TOO FAR! Even for MY standards!

BG: They are MY standards now. And don't think you two are going to be teamed up so that you can continue on and try and stop me, in fact she won't even be in the Neither world.

Bj: That's not-

BG: Toodles.

BeetleGuese waved goodbye and disappeared with Lydia in hand. The road faded away and Beetlejuice was sent hurling towards the dessert floor.

Beetlejuice sat there with his legs sprawled out and looked around.

He saw what looked like a fin shaped like a rock move into the sand.

Bj: Oh boy.

Charles huddled into the corner to the best of his ability as he watched the broom stick become shorter and shorter.

The little toy chopped off the last piece of the broom and watched the last of the handle roll away into the darkness.

Charles grew pale as the evil plaything reared its head back at him in a 360 degree rotation. The little grey bear lifted its knife and stood as tall as it could. It aimed the knife at Charles' ankle, and as it took that one step closer its eyes grew dim and it fell to the ground lifeless hitting the pavement with a soft squeak.

Charles: AHEH!

Charles flinched and waited to feel the most irreparable pain he could imagine. After a few moments had passed he looked over at the bear lying on its face motionless once again.

Charles backed up against the wall trying to become as flat as possible.

Suddenly he heard the front door open and shut.

Charles: I'M IN THE GARAGE HELP!

Delia rode up the hill feeling a little bit better about her day. After all she tamed a wild walking garbage can that drug her to every filth inhabited place in the entire county, all she had to do now was get cleaned up and finish her shopping. On the plus side, she got some great inspiration for her next line of art work. Suddenly the can began to shake and the long curly legs sticking out of the bottom retracted and the can fell to the ground dumping her and the garbage all over the road.

Delia: Oh! Ouch. Now what?

She stood up and watched the living tin creature become reduced to a lifeless garbage can once again. Looking ironically disappointed she looked up the hill and could see her house.

Delia: Well it got me this close.

Exhausted, she opened the front door and let the wind slam it shut for her.

Delia: Should have taken the car.

Charles: I'M IN THE GARAGE HELP!

Delia: What did I tell him about trying to fix things in there!

Delia walked in the garage half annoyed.

Delia: OH Charles you KNOW how I feel about you working on the ca-

Delia looked down at the end of the garage, and pushed against the back wall was here cowardly husband.

Delia: (sigh) What happened this time did you see another spider?

Charles pointed at the limp teddy bear on the ground.

Charles: (In faint and frightened voice) That toy tried to kill me!

The man then went back to his upright fetal position.

Delia looked down at the bear. Then looked at Charles.

Delia: Charles it probably just fell from the shelf. I think your way over stressed and haven't been doing enough bird watching.

Delia walked over to him, picked the toy up and led her husband to the kitchen.

Delia: I need a shower, and am going to finish my shopping. Take this up to Lydia's room maybe she'll be glad to see one of her old toys.

Delia slapped the toy right into Charles' palm causing him to stop right in his tracks. He turned his head to the stairs and saw the knife marks in the door.

Out of fright he dropped the bear.

Delia: Charles put it away.

Charles: But.

Delia: NOW!

Before he could get a good glimpse of her facial expression he was half way up the stairs. He unlocked the door and tried to push it open but it hit Lydia's dresser which had been pushed up against the door earlier.

Charles: Gulp.

He used his strength to enter Lydia's room. Once inside he lifted the bear up and shook it a little.

Charles: Hmmm.

He then noticed two bite-like holes on its leg.

Charles: Odd.

From fear of finding out anything more about the formerly demonic toy, he set it right back on the bead for Lydia to deal with and put her dresser back.

As he left he kept his eyes on the bear which lie still on its face, then shut the door.

Charles leaned his back on the door and took a deep breathe of relief.

He slowly and slightly happily made his way down the stairs feeling more relaxed than ever. He sat down at the kitchen table with a half-tired smile on his face.

Just then Delia came walking in dressed to go shopping yet again.

Delia: Charles I may be out for awhile would you like me to heat up a doughnut for you?

Without changing his expression he casually reached over for the box of doughnuts and pushed them down into the garbage can.

Delia looked at the now full trash can.

Delia: I'll just take this out on my way.

She picked up the plastic container, walked outside and slammed the entire trash bin into the neighbor's large green recycle bin. She smacked her hands together as she walked away.

Delia: It feels good to give back.

She walked to the drive way and drove to the shopping center in the other car. Charles locked himself in his study, turned the T.V. to the discovery channel, and slowly drifted off in his recliner chair.

To be continued...Watch the news part 2


	6. Seperation is murder

Separation is Murder

Watch the news part 2

BeetleGuese held Lydia by the shirt as he dangled on his spider legs waiting for the portal leading to the real world to open.

BG: Go to sleep little meddler of destinies. Your adventures of a land you should never have found will end here.

Lydia began to drift off to sleep as if his words themselves were soothing even though they were full of spite.

Lydia: But…Beetle…I have to help…Beet…must say…beejui…beetle...bee...zzzz.

BeetleGuese smirked as his lullaby of words softened her thoughts.

Looking into the forming portal, BeetleGuese could make out the inner workings of her room on the other side.

BG: Well, this is your stop. See you in the after life.

With no regard for her safety he tossed her slender figure into the portal.

Instead of falling to the floor and possibly breaking a bone, Lydia fell slowly and softly onto her bed and cuddled her pillow.

BeetleGuese sneered while he stared at the slumbering girl as the portal began to close.

He nonchalantly pulled out a note pad and pen and made the motion of checking something off of his list.

BG: Well, better get in before it closes.

BeetleGuese slipped one of his long striped legs into the portal and set it on Lydia's floor.

BG: I hate the real world.

He closed his eyes and jumped in.

As he dove through the other half of the portal, his figure changed to that of an orange and stripped cat.

BeetleGuese readied himself to jump out of her window when a thought came into mind that he couldn't resist. He crept up onto her bed, and sat softly on her chest. Over looking her features in disgust, he sneered in repulse and hatred as he reached a claw to her cheek.

BG: I can't say goodbye without a parting gift.

BeetleGuese ran his claw slowly across her cheek cutting her enough to cause blood to slowly seep from her wound.

BG: I only wish I could do more. (Evil smirk)

He left the room like a shadow and scurried off into the night.

Meanwhile Beetlejuice sat in the sand afraid to move. A large thin triangular rock with a half circle cit into it on the back edge, sunk into the sand a few feet.

BJ: If I didn't know any better, I'd say that thing just moved. Looking the rock over, he began to get the feeling he'd seen this very rock before.

Grasping his chin in deep thought as he stood up, Beetlejuice looked up at the rock again, but this time his subconscious was making him imagine a lady up against it, screaming.

Bj: Delia? How could I have seen Delia riding this-

Suddenly bursts of images filled his mind.

Bj: THE SAND SHARK!

Beetlejuice quickly covered his mouth as if to take back the words he said at full volume.

The sand rumbled and the rocky fin sunk all the way into the ground.

Bj: uh oh.

Beetlejuice calculated which way he had come from by remembering which way Doomy was facing before the road disapeared.

The Sand Shark burst up out of the sand like a great white leaping up for meat on a hook, Just barley missing Beetlejuice by a few feet.

Bj: AHHHHhhhhh! (whispering) What are the chances?

Beetlejuice turned into a cheetah and sprinted for his afterlife. Beetlejuice dodged the rocks around him that looked very similar to the fin of the sand shark as he ran as fast as he could. Beetlejuice looked back to see the distance he was making. The Sand Shark plowed through the sand as if it were water tossing large clouds of dust and rock into the air filling the sky behind it.

Bj: AHHh! Not fast enough!

The shark began to open its mouth as it gained on the ghoul.

Bj: OK, stay calm, it's not a Sand Worm, you beat it before…sorta, you can beat it again. After all it's just a big fish (looking back at it) with teeth like BROKEN GLASS! I just have to tire it out.

Just as the Sand Shark began to slow down, Beetlejuice noticed a row of red spikes on either side of him, matching his speed. One row of spikes dove out of the sand like a dolphin and dove back in.

Bj: AND SAND WORMS?

One of the worms slid toward Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice closed his eyes waiting for defeat when suddenly he heard the roar of the sand worm as it hit a rock. Upon opening his eyes Beetlejuice saw that he had transformed into a falcon and led the worm right into a rock knocking the beast unconscious.

Bj: Ha HAH! Reflexes, I owe you one.

The Sand Shark again gained on him as it swallowed the lifeless Sand Worm.

Bj: Uh oh Big boy has had his breakfast.

Beetlejuice spotted a large wide rock with one hole in the middle.

Bj: Ok reflexes don't fail me now.

The Sand Shark Leapt up and dove for Beetlejuice.

Beetlejuice tucked his wings in hoping to make it through the hole before the shark got to him.

Like a bullet from a gun, Beetlejuice darted out from the rock's hole unscathed. He looked back to see if he was safe. As he watched the rock get farther from him, a giant thud sounded on the other side of the rock causing it to crack all over as dust shot off of the rocky monument.

Bj: Yeehaaaw! Ick! I'm starting to sound like the Monster from across the street.

Beetlejuice continued in his direction at full speed and disappeared into the sunset on the horizon.

Charles sat in the kitchen deep in thought attempting to assure himself he didn't imagine the entire afternoon and at the same time trying to convince himself he did.

Charles: The Doughnuts! They must have been spiked with something! I'm going right down there and telling them that they are using funny sugars in their doughnuts. Those darn teenagers there have mocked me for the last time!

As Charles stood and exclaimed his plan, he noticed that he had wet himself earlier.

Charles: Oh brother. Guess I'll be taking a shower now.

Lydia slowly woke form her slumber. She sat up somewhat in a daze.

Lyida: (yawn) Wh- When did I get home? Did I sleep all day?

Lydia picked up her alarm clock.

Lydia: Oh man, I must be sick again.

Lydia got out of bed and heard a squeak on her floor. Lydia had knocked the teddy bear off of her bed.

Lydia: Hmmm. What a creepy looking toy. I et Beetlejuice got it for me to say he was sorry. He's got another thing coming if he thinks I'm forgiving him just because he gave me a toy.

As she reached for her door knob, she noticed the large splinters hole in her door. Lydia grew a bit concerned.

Lydia: Dad? Delia?

Lydia called as she walked down stairs. The house was dark, and no one seemed to be home. Suddenly she heard the fain sound of water.

Lydia: Dad?

Lydia crept into her parent's bedroom. The bathroom was slightly open and the shower was running?

Lydia grabbed one of Charles golf clubs out his golf bag near the door.

She stalked closer to the bathroom door listening for anything weird.

Suddenly the door swung open and out of fright and excitement, Lydia slammed the club down before she could see who came out of the bathroom.

Lydia: DADDY! I'm so sorry!

Charles: OH…groan. Lydia?

Lydia I saw knife marks in my door and got scared. The house was dark, I was afraid something bad happened.

Charles: Oh that's ok Lydia, I was just grabbing a CD to sooth me while I showered. Ooohh ouch that smarts. The old 3 wood packs quite the wallop, I know how the golf ball feels now.

Lydia: Let's get some ice on that.

Charles: I'm going to take my shower first.

Lydia helped her father back to his feet.

Charles: I have to get down to Dunky Doughnuts before they close an have a word with the manager about those teenagers.

Lydia: Did they replace the sugar with salt again?

Charles: No they sold me "special" doughnuts this time. That's down right illegal.

Lydia: I'll drive you there daddy. Just let me know when you're ready.

Charles nodded and got into the shower.

Lydia began turning on a few lights to make the house less creepy looking.

Lydia: Time to warm up the car.

Just then the door bell rang.

Lydia: Who could that be at this time of night?

Lydia peeked out the peep hole and saw a pair of dark glasses. She slowly opened the door and peeked out.

Lydia: Can I help… hey weren't you guys here already?

Two FBI agent stood in the door way.

Lydia couldn't help but feel a little under pressure.

Agent#1: We were doing our rounds today when we caught a glimpse of your mother-

Lydia: She's not my Mother.

Agent#1: …Your step mother, excuse me, using an odd form of transportation today.

Agent#2 whipped out a photo of a very disgruntled Delia riding a Garbage can up the hill.

Agent#2: Know anything about this Ma'am?

Lydia tried to hold her giggles back.

Lydia: No, sorry ahem. No I've never seen her that upset before.

Agent#2 frowned un-amused.

Agent#2: I'm talking about the walking trash can miss.

Lydia: Well we don't park that thing in the garage if that's what you want to know. I wouldn't have the slightest idea where Delia found such a thing or why she'd be seen riding it. Unless its one of her art pieces, but then again I've never seen one that came to life( except when the we lived with the Maitlands), heck I've never seen one that I even liked heh heh.

Agent#1: Ma'am we'd appreciate it if you'd be a little more serious with us. We are here investigating reports of supernatural activity, so farm we have you family to suspect as a cause.

Lydia: Honestly that is our garbage can, but yesterday it was not alive and Delia has her own car, and has never ridden a can home before. Serious enough for ya?

Agent#2: Yes…thank you.

Agent#1: May we come in and take a look around please? I have to get rid of my suspicions, not that I don't trust you miss. But I can't have it keep me up at night.

Lydia: Whatever, sure come in. Investigate 'til your eyes fall out.

The tow agents took a look around the living room. Suddenly Agent#2 pulled out a little electronic devise, and began scanning a stain on the stair well.

Agent#1: What have you found Agent K?

Lydia began to get nervous now that they were using devices. What if they were to find traces of Beetlejuice, fur from his dog form or some lingering energy? Lydia began to tense up as they looked up the stairs.

Agent#2: It's male urine…human.

The two agents looked over at Lydia at the same time.

Lydia: My dad is afraid of a lot of things, maybe saw a spider.

Agent#2: Are you ok miss? You seem a bit tense.

Agent#1 elbowed #2.

Agent#1: (Whispering) Keep your eyes on the road K. Don't let your other brain think for you. Now is not the time.

Lydia noticed them acting a bit out of character and started feeling suspicious. She looked the two "agents" over. Agent#1 was quite tall, about 6 feet or so. Long, white-blonde hair tied up in a loose pony tail for a professional look. Pale features and a thin yet in shape build that she could see even with his suit on. Agent#2 however was about her height a little taller. He had pure white hair. His skin was a bit healthier looking then his counterpart. His hair was combed in a conservative manner. He obviously wore it spiky most of the time because of the way it held together, which told her that he isn't on the job very often. She studied his body structure. He was definitely in shape. She caught herself looking a little too hard, and got her focus back. The taller one seemed far too pale looking to be considered healthy enough for the FBI. So the game of cat and mouse began.

Lydia: So, What are the views of long hair in the FBI? Couldn't a culprit use your hair against you?

Agent#1: Not if you do your job right.

(He had her there. But it wasn't convincing her.)

Lydia: How old do you have to be to get into the FBI?

Agent#1: ( errg she's getting annoying.) 21.

Lydia: Pfft. He isn't 21. I'd maybe guess he was tow years older than me at most.

Agent #1 got off of his knees and walked up to Lydia.

Agent#1: He is my assistant and intern. He doesn't have to be 21. Besides this is just an investigation, we aren't defusing a bomb.

(Darn they are good)

Lydia: So why-

Before she could ask they were looking into a light coming from a hole in her door.

Lydia: -great-

The younger agent scanned the hole with his device.

Agent#2: Agent E! Come take a look at this!

The agents huddled and whispered beyond Lydia's hearing. She tried not to creep behind them so she wouldn't seem like she was hiding something.

Agent#2: (Whispering) It's caked in supernatural energy. This is the hot spot of this town I'm sure of it.

Agent#1: Well, whatever wanted out came from the other side of this door.

Agent#2: How do you know it didn't want in the room?

Agent#1: Take a good look at the direction the splinters are pointing.

The taller agent stood up and opened the door with no respect for her privacy.

Lydia: Hey! You can't snoop in my room!

Lydia followed them up stairs.

Agent#1: As I recall, we're here to investigate until our eyes pop out.

Lydia grumbled as she clenched her fists.

Agent#2 yelled from inside her room.

Agent#2: IT"S EVERYWHERE!

The little device was beeping off the scale making a rather loud and annoying beeping.

Charles came running out his room in a towel.

Charles: IS THE HOUSE ON FIRE!

Lydia: No dad! The FBI guys are back investigating my room!

Look guys, in the other house we lived in we had ghosts. But we moved and maybe these ghost followed me, but aren't you here to investigate the monsters not ghosts?

(She had them there)

Agent#1: Well… I said nothing about ghosts.

Lydia: Well the Deetz' didn't let giant monsters loose in peaceful pines.

So I had ghosts once before. That has nothing to do with you. Now get back to your job and out of my room.

Lydia Shooed them down the stairs.

Agent#2 continued to follow the signal to the garage.

Lydia followed them to the garage.

Agent#1: Well, well, what happened here?

Lyida: Oh my. D-AD!

Charles was strapping his tie on as he walked into the garage.

Lydia motioned to the car.

Lydia: What happened here?

Charles went pale.

Charles: It really was all real.

Lydia: what was real?

Charles that teddy bear in your room tried to kill me.

Lydia: So you PUT IT BACK in MY ROOM!

Agent#1 motioned Agent#2 away.

Agent#1: Well, I think I have enough o work with here.

He began to walk into the living room.

Lydia grabbed his arm.

Lydia: What do you mean you have enough to work with?

Agent#1: Sorry miss that's classified information now.

The agent walked to the front door and opened it then paused.

Agent#1: Agent K! Let's go! We got what we came for.

Agent#2 came walking down stairs holding the old teddy bear.

Lydia tensed up in anger.

Lydia: I can't let them learn anymore. They might learn too much. I have to go warn Bj.

Delia pulled up in her car and noticed the two men leaving her house.

She quickly got out and headed to open the trunk.

Delia: Why hello again you two!

The two agents stopped and looked at each other for a moment and then walked up to Delia.

Agent#1: Ma'am is this you in this photo?

Agent#2 showed her the photo of her on the walking garbage can.

Delia: Why yes! I was walking to the store when this garbage can with curly legs attacked me. And DRAGGED me to EVERY garbage filled place in town!

I was forced to tame it and rode it home. But it suddenly croaked on its way up the hill. I think it went too long without some garbage to eat. When you think about it, it was a very useful creature.

Agent#2 looked at the toy bear.

Agent#2: This toy bear attacked your husband earlier today. It also became lifeless after a given amount of time. Do you know of anything that could cause this?

Delia: Well no! I suspect those beasts are creating these other things to happen. But why it's only happening to us is a mystery to me.

Agents: Hmmm…

Agent#1: Thank you for your time ma'am.

Delia: Oh you are very welcome. Anything to help you gentlmen find those monsters who are terrorizing our town.

Delia grabbed some groceries as she waved them goodbye and walked to the front door.

The agents got into their black sedan and drove off.

Beetlejuice had been soaring over the sands all day trying to glide as often as he could to save energy. The heat was getting to him and soon the cold night would freeze him either way he knew something would cause him to fall into the sand helpless. He began to descend to a nearby rock, the first big rock he'd seen for miles. It was a nice and round rock, compared to the other sharp and thin ones he'd seen, this one looked comfy. He slowly landed on top of it and began letting himself tire out and relax. In a few seconds he returned to his regular form.

Bj: Too tired. Huff puff, can't keep my alternate form. Zzzzz

Beeltejuice passed out on the rock as a large ominous shadow hovered over him.

Charles: Lydia! Delia! Come Watch the news!

Delia ran out into the living room and took her spot next to Charles.

Charles: Lydia! Honey?

Lydia yelled form her room.

Lydia: In a minute dad! I'm…I'm not dressed.

Lydia tried desperately to summon her friend from her mirror.

Lydia: Beetlejuice BEETLEJUICE! AWW crap! Why won't he answer?

What's going on Beej?

Lydia unable to do anything else turned toward her door and joined her family downstairs.

News: So, It seems that Peaceful Pines is in the eye of a very rare hurricane originating from the Bermuda Triangle! Weather scans show the hurricane's trajectory here…

Lydia: Hurricane? How dumb do they-

Charles: Shh honey, watch the news.

News: Apparently this Hurricane is SO large that they eye is aseveral hundred miles around. And the rest of the hurricane is SO slow that we wouldn't be able to see it or feel it. That's right Tom. The hurricane A.K.A. hurricane Lydia..

Lydia: WHAT?

Delia: Oh Lydia it's just a coincidence.

News: Is nothing more than a mixture of gases and smells from the many exotic and some times illegal plants that seem to grow there in the mysterious triangle islands. Correct Amy, The early spring allergy season we're seeing is caused by these plants. The gases of which can cause mass hallucinations. When the hurricane first struck the gasses caused us to think we were seeing monsters destroying our once peaceful town, when in actuality it was just the hurricanes natural destructive force. We all know monsters don't exist, and if there were monsters, why have they not been seen since? There were no conclusive reports as to what the monsters were, people were saying snakes, worms, and sharks. These gases obviously had our fears coming to life in our own minds heh heh heh. You couldn't be any more right Tom.

However we may be in the eye of this hurricane, the meteorologists say the storm is so large that it can't hold its form for very long. And Peaceful Pines

Might not have to endure the rest of the hurricane for it will have dissipated by this Friday clearing the beach for spring fun.

Well you heard it here people the dispute of monsters has all come to an end. Once again our parents were right when they told us there were no monsters in our closets. Oh Tom you kidder!

Lydia sat there with her mouth agape in disbelief. Before she decided to dispute the teddy bear and garbage can she realized that this is what she and Beetlejuice were trying to accomplish in the first place, and let it go.

Lydia: That solves on of my problems.

News: As for the school situation, All the former students of Ms. Shannon's School for Girls will temporarily be transferred to the outside class rooms of our very own Peaceful Pines High School. Classes will start this following Monday at their regular times. This is Tom Greygoreman.

And Amy Wilks (both) For Channel 12 News goodnight.

Lydia switched the T.v. off.

Lydia: Well at least I get to go to the high school. Maybe Delia and Charles will let me enroll there after I prove I can handle public school.

Meanwhile, at the Brewster mansion.

Claire: Gunther, could you like answer the door or whatever you do around here? That door bell is causing me to cringe which will give me wrinkles, and daddy will have to take it out of your salary if I end up looking as old as you when I'm 21!

Gunther, already about to open the door rolled his eyes and sulked then posed himself as he got ready to answer the door bell.

Gunther: Can I-

Looking down he saw a cat with a name tag.

Gunther: Miss Claire! I believe another one of your male admirers have sent you another kitten.

Claire: Don't TOUCH it!

Claire came running down the stairs.

Claire: It might be from Kyle!

Claire slowed down as she saw the mangy cat with a note tied to its collar.

Claire: This is probably another weird cat from Andrew, what a freak. He is like SO obsessed with me. Look, he can't even afford to BUY me a cat. He sends me an orange stray cat. But I do like orange, it is the new pink, so I'll give him that much.

Gunther walked off into another room and closed it off with the large oak doors separating himself from her sight.

Claire: You're an ugly kitty. I won't even pick you up until daddy has you fixed and cleaned.

Claire kneeled down and tilted the note so she could read it.

Claire: Sigh another badly written poem…Sometimes your hair smells of sweet salon moose, your perfume reminds me of the freshest orange juice.

But the way you make me treat me makes me feel like I'm caked in beatle juse beatle juse? What's that supposed to mean? And he spelled beetle juice

Wro-

Claire and the cat disappeared in an abrupt and violent flash of purple and black explosions followed by dimming red light.

To be continued… Separation is Murder part 2


	7. Seperation is murder pt2

Separation is Murder

Part 2

Using Old Juice

The suns of Saturn (Sandworm land/dessert outskirts) began to rise over the horizon and the cool winds of the night began to dissipate allowing the scorching light of the suns to heat up the sand.

: Wake up worm bait.

A large shadow loomed over the slightly frozen and slumbering ghoul named Beetlejuice. Again in a feminine and elderly voice that sounded like it suffered from harsh lung cancer, the shadow spoke again a bit angrily.

: WAKE UP! You zombie haired waste of skin!

Beetlejuice tossed in his sleep mumbling.

Bj: No granny zzz five more millennia zzz I don't wanna zzz go to zzzzz pancakes zzz.

Sandworm: Reeeaaarrrggghh!

Immediately Beetlejuice jumped out of his boots screaming.

Bj: IT'S IN MY HAIR! Oh…bad dream.

Beetlejuice wiped the sleep from his eyes as he floated back to his boots which lay empty on the flat rounded rock.

Bj: Coulda swore I heard a sand worm.

Beetlejuice didn't notice the giant figure waiting behind him. He gazed about his sunlit surroundings and sniffed the natural air.

Bj: Glorious mornings…ya know I hate'm.

Beetlejuice began putting his boots on.

: You're about as bright as a new moon.

A little startled, Beetlejuice spun around and looked in front of him. A large pink and purple striped figure towered above him. He slowly directed his gaze in the vicinity of the figures face. Shadowed by the sunlight behind its head, the elderly-looking sandworm gazed down upon him with annoyance.

Beetlejuice froze up and fell to pieces.

Sandworm: You spineless bag of bones, get up! I wouldn't put you in my mouth to save my afterlife!

Beetlejuice's dismembered pieces slowly reconfigured into their original soggy shape.

The sour sandworm lowered her head to get within socializing distance.

Beetlejuice flinched thinking it was for biting distance.

Sandworm: Don't you recognize me?

Beetlejuice built up a little composure and looked carefully.

Bj: No, not really, all you sandworms look the same to me.

Sandworm: You soggy nipple head! I'm your grandma!

Beetlejuice glared at her, as if he was considering what she told him.

Bj: Look lady, I don't know what kinda mind game you think your running here, but my grandma is NOT a sandworm. So if you think your old sandworm nag tricks can fool me into becoming a meal, you can think again. So now that your cover has been blown, and I can obviously out run your wrinkled old tail, I'll just be moseying on out of here and forget you ever bugged me.

Before he could finish another thought the sandworm disappeared in a flash of light and was replaced by the sight of a knotted old cane swinging into his face. Before he could react the cane bashed him in his skull and knocked him flat on his back.

Grandma Prunejuice: You self-centered unearthed half-wit! What monster with the capabilities to think, would even consider eating you! Let alone want to claim they are related to you? Even I don't like admitting I'm related to you! Talking sandworms…ARE YOU KIDDING! What are you, Brainless!

Bj: Actually-

G.Pj: Clamp you noise-hole, and come have tea with me.

Bj: (She missed me)

G.Pj: And no thinking! You're gonna give yourself a tumor!

The two ghouls floated off of the round rock and headed for Prunejuice's ram-shackled cottage that hung and teetered in the sky impaled on a tall and jagged rock a few yards away.

G.Pj: You're lucky I saw you out here on my property before the sand worms did. I almost decided to go into a coma today and whittle the day away inside my home.

Beetlejuice just mimicked his grandmother's nagging silently by copying her facial expressions as she boasted to herself. Without looking behind her, she nagged some more.

G.Pj: Don't make faces like that at me or I'll make sure your face stays that way!

Immediately he stopped mimicking her, and put his hands in his pockets with a fearful-monotone expression. The sound of shifting sand diverted his attention to the ground. A large vortex of sand whirled around the base of the jagged rock her cottage sat upon as if it were live quicksand.

Bj: When did you get a sand lion?

G.Pj: Oh, your brother Donny gave it to me for my Death-day. That dunder headed goody-goody finally got me something useful for once.

Beetlejuice sulked in brief anger as he thought about Donny.

Bj: (He's always gotta show me up on Death-days.)

G.Pj: Oh don't sulk! That sewage shooter you gave me has been put to good use. I let it run loose outside, it drives the sandworms crazy and keeps them fairly far away.

As they began to reach the edge of the porch the sand lion jumped out of its trap and chomped at Beetlejuice.

G.Pj: Cerberus! What did I tell you about attacking mommy's guests!

Grandma Prunejuice batted the creature on the head with her cane, and it hid back in the sand yelping.

G.Pj: One more time and I'll turn you into jerky!

Bj: You named it? You've never named the monsters we've given you before.

G.Pj: Well he's a good worm hunter, so I decided he deserved one.

Bj: You old softy, just can't help getting attached to a vile creature after you tame it can you?

G.Pj: I'm letting you into my house. That should say enough.

Bj: Very funny.

The two ghastly relatives finally landed on the porch. Grandma Prunejuice pulled out a giant key with a spiked skull attached to the handle from out of her pocket. She held it like a mace in her hands as she approached the door.

G.Pj: OPEN UP! Or I'll BASH you into FIRE WOOD!

The front door unlocked itself and opened quickly to let her in.

Bj: Wow! You finally got a skeleton key for this stubborn old house.

G.Pj: Your mother, Bee sent it to me for Mother's day last year. Such a thoughtful woman. Unlike your senile old man Gnat. Useless excuse for a son got me a neck tie!

Grandma Prunejuice stuffed the oversized key back into her small pocket as she entered her misshapen home.

Bj: Whoa.

Beetlejuice looked around noticing the house was a few stories bigger on the inside then it was on the outside.

Bj: What's with all the extra rooms and hallways? Thinking of building a labyrinth?

G.Pj: Most of these rooms are storage for all the gut-retching gifts I got over the years from fans, clients and other putrid types of folk that knew of me. I'll get the kettle on sit down and don't touch anything.

Prunejuice's house was cluttered with all kinds of nick-knacks and antiques. Making it hard to see the whole house or even get around. Shelves and bookcases were packed full of jars containing various oddities like eyeballs, and soil, teeth and spiders etc. stacks of books piled 4 ft high or more lined most of the walls and some of the walk ways. Several odd-looking small creatures crawled from place to place every so often, making their own unique sounds as they moved through the clutter.

Bj: Wish I had as nice a place as this.

Beetlejuice continued following his grandmother through the maze of collectables. They finally reached her "kitchen" which looked more like a witch's cauldron room. The walls were hidden behind cabinets and shelves that housed all manner of containers holding thousands of different herbs, ingredients and strange objects. A small chimney opening in the wall with a large iron pot served as an oven, kettle, and stove in one easy to make fire. From between some stacks of pots and pans, she whipped out a teapot, lighted a fire with a flick of her hand, filled the pot with some water from a pump in the middle of her floor, placed a small bag of herbs inside the pot and hung the kettle above the small flame.

G.Pj: What in Grimm's name are you following me around for? Why don't you go clear us a spot on the table in the main room?

Beetlejuice wormed his way around the junk trying to find the main room.

Bj: Oh no. IM LOST!

From behind one of the piles of books Granny peered through a hole at Beetlejuice's face.

G.Pj: Sit on the couch behind you bright eyes.

Grandma Prunejuice hovered to the couch from around the corner of collected trinkets.

G.Pj: So, what brings you out here in the far reaches of Saturn? Were you not able to talk your way out of trouble this time? They all finally decide to throw you to the sand worms?

Bj: Well, it's kind of a long story.

Beetlejuice waited for his grandma to reply with an "Oh" and not have to talk about it but-

G.Pj: I'm not getting any younger, spill the beans! Don't worry about staying too long, time works normally here inside my house. You don't have to worry about being gone from the Neitherworld for too long. Not like anyone will miss you.

Bj: Oh my ghouls! LYDIA! I hope I'm not too late! Sorry Granny I have to get back to the Neitherworld!

Beetlejuice stood up and began heading to the door.

G.Pj: Do you realize how far away from the city you are?

Beetlejuice turned around a bit confused.

G.Pj: You're still a good 3 days walk from making it back to civilization…if that's what you want to call it. That would be around ten years for your friend. How long have you been out there, before I found you?

Beetlejuice sulked realizing he's been missing from Lydia for a long time by now.

Bj: About a day and a half. Maybe more, I was driven out here and dumped…by myself.

G.Pj: Well obviously by yourself! You're alone! Do you think I'm senile!

Bj: No, I mean, there's another ME out there and he dumped me out here to get rid of me. And to make things worse, he has Lydia.

Granny tried to think of something to say to him to let him realize he did something wrong, but secretly; she liked Beetlejuice best out of all of her relatives. Her heart broke for him, and her features went soft and caring.

G.Pj: I can help you get to your friend.

Bj: Come again? I don't think I heard you right.

Beetlejuice used his pinky to rub out some ear wax that was possibly ruining his hearing.

G.Pj: Let this old crab use her old juice to help you get home.

Bj: I swear you gotta be slurring your words. Say again?  
Grandma Prunejuice became angry and whacked him on the head with her cane.

G.Pj: I said I can get you home faster, you ungrateful ghoul! We'll give that grandson imposter a taste of some REAL family juicing!

Meanwhile in the outer world.

Demon: You now belong to us flesh bags! If you act like an animal you get fed like one too, obedience is your only option, so treat your new masters with respect!

Later…

Cowboy Monster: Well I reckon this one'id do good, he's got nice strong arms and legs on'em. And check out those pearly-whites! I'll take him!

The tall rugged hair-beast chained the boy up and nearly dragged him to the ghoulish truck full of skeleton cattle.

Cowboy Monster: You best keep your mouth shut at all times boy. I ain't talk'n about talk'n. At my ranch, I breed lots of mean dogs, they won't attack you unless you run, or smile at them. To them, smile'n's like showing yer teeth in anger. You smile at them then they's a gonna rip yer pretty face right off. So, I'd think twice and put your priorities in order, keep your face? Or brush your teeth? It's your choice.

Two years later…

Cowboy Monster: Sick'em Gravedigger! Find that ungrateful little meat bag!

GraveDigger: Roarf roarf!

Cowboy Monster: He can't run no where's, he's in the dessert. There ain't no where's to hide. Either Gravedigger will find him or the sand worms will.

The monster's truck started up, and the head lights shined behind him. His wide body prevented him from seeing the lights turn on. The truck blazed right for him. He turned around hearing the sound of the monstrous truck's engine shifting gears.

Cowboy Monster: SON OF A-!

Present day…

Girl: Oh, come on. Come to church with me and my parents, they have been dying to meet you! Besides, the church has benches, we can hold hands and pretend we're listening, what do you say?

The Boy followed the girl inside the church building. As he opened the door, he accidentally opened it to fast and it hit the wall, cracking a bit of the stain glass design on the door.

Girl: Its ok, it happens all the time. This building isn't built to be wind-friendly, sometimes the wind opens the door more then you want.

The couple proceeded into the building as the organ music began to play.

The girl didn't notice, but the boy realized the farther he entered the more cracking noises he heard. He looked up at the many stain glass windows. Each time he passed parallel by a window, it would crack down the middle. Each time it got louder, and the cracks would worsen on each new window.

The boy put his head between his shoulders cringing to the sounds.

A few people began to notice the windows cracking.

The girls parents turned around to see them walking towards their bench.

Father: Hello pumpkin. Is this your new friend?

Mother: Why he's so handsome!

Girl: This is my father, and stepmother-

Boy: So nice to finally meet you!

They all shook hands and the couple sat next to the girl's parents.

As the boy listened to the sermon, he heard the wood of the bench making a grinding noise. The people behind him started whispering. And the people next to him were scooting over even his girlfriend. He looked around to see the finish and the wood itself was rotting and spreading from the spot he sat on. A bit startled the boy jumped up and tripped over the bench in front of him. He pulled him self up by holding onto the altar. As soon as he placed his hand on the gold cross attached to the front of the altar, the entire oak alter burst into flames immediately and the fire almost reached the ceiling.

The priest and the boy were blown back by the force of the flames.

The townsfolk began screaming and running for the door. The windows gave way and began shattering one at a time. Before he could witness anymore destruction the girl grabbed his wrist and pulled him outside to safety.

As people ran for their cars and some stood and watched the building burn, the girl and the boy ran for her parent's home. As she pulled him across the street a giant diesel truck ripped him from her hands.

Boy: AAAHHHHHH! (Gasp) (Pant)

He looked at his surroundings as he sweated and gasped for air in his bed.

His bedroom door opened and the lights flicked on.

A shirt-less man with long blonde-white bed-hair wearing sweatpants stumbled in the boy's door way

Endri: You having that nightmare again?

Kyle: Yeah…

Endri: I thought so. I heard that scream you make when you have that dream. Damn thing wakes me up every time. You ok?

Kyle: Yeah sorry. I haven't had this dream since before we came here. But ever since we went into that girl's house, I have been having it every night. Except tonight, tonight it was different.

Endri sighed as he looked at his watch, and pulled up a chair to his friend's bed.

Endri: OK. Tell me all about it. You should get it off your mind and talk about it I suppose. (Yawns)

Kyle: Well, it didn't start out like usual, I don't see me get kidnapped, I'm just already in the slave cart. And then at the end, I'm here in town with a dark haired girl. I can't tell who she is because she wears her hair half way over her face. I guess we go to school together in my dream. But I've never seen her at school in real life before.

Endri: Well I'd say you're getting over this dream if there is less of it when you dream about it. Besides at the end your hormones give you a pretty girl instead of you being crucified by an angry mob.

Kyle: That's just it. I go to church with her. And literally burn it down just by standing in it. And the townsfolk in the church look just like the mob in my other version of this dream. Except, she pulls me from their sight before they even look for me. She saves me.

Endri: (Yawn) Good sounds like you're working this thing out in your mind.

Kyle: Then I get hit by a truck while she takes me to her house.

Endri put his hand to his forehead and ran it down his face in frustration.

Endri: Ok. So it seems the dream is worsening for you. You've had this dream for years now. And it hasn't happened. You're always your present age in this dream, and it's always happening in the town we live in, this thing is just a nightmare about your past. It's half of the reason we're always moving. And your fears keep changing it. I don't think you need to worry about this dream. You just need to forget about it, and maybe it won't keep haunting you.

Kyle: But what about the part where I get this!

Kyle pulled up the sleeve of his shirt.

Kyle: It is one thing to have a dream about being tortured. It's another to wake up with the scars! This dream is telling me something that I can't remember.

Endri sighed knowing he would never be able to get his friend over his fears of the past.

Endri: I know buddy, our search for answers has led us this far, so don't worry, we'll find out who did this to you. I have a feeling we're close. We'll get this ugly mess all settled, and we won't have to run from those bastards anymore. Get some sleep, we have a big day (Looks at watch) (sigh) ahead of us tomorrow.

Endri rubbed Kyle's white hair and turned off the lights as he got to the door way.

Endri: Want me to check under your bed?

Kyle: HA HA very funny.

Endri: Night.

Kyle: Goodnight.

Lydia sat Indian style facing her mirror half asleep as the sun rose through her windows the next morning. She mumbled as she began dozing off.

Lydia: Beetlejuice…beetle…juice…Beetlejuice…beetle-…beetle…juice.

As her elbow slipped she shot up awake again.

Lydia: Beetlejuice? Sigh.

She looked at her mirror again.

Lydia: Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice. Sigh. Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice………

She looked over at her clock and began to cry. As her feelings of defeat took over, she sobbed into the palms of her hands.

Charles came down stairs to the kitchen with a sad expression of pity on his face.

Delia: Is she ok? She hasn't come to breakfast even. School starts in an hour.

Charles: I don't think we should bother her today. It sounds like she wasn't able to get a hold of Betty last night. I think she was up all night crying.

Delia: Oh no. her poor little friend. I sure hope she's ok. Why don't we offer to take Lydia to the hospital to look for her?

Charles: I don't know, let's wait for her to come down and talk to us first. I don't want her to think we're prying.

Delia: Poor little dear. Should we check on her in a little bit?

Charles: She locked the door. We'll have to wait.

Lydia got off of the floor, and laid-down on her bed. Looking at her wall, she noticed her favorite Frankenstein doll on her dresser. Lydia got up and picked the doll up. She got back in her bed and fell asleep holding it.

The school bell rang and the students of Ms. Shannon gathered in the trailer class room outside of the school. The class took their seats, all but Lydia and Claire. The students whispered amongst themselves as they waited for Miss Shannon to show up.

Prudence: Where is Lydia?

Bertha: I haven't seen her. But I heard Claire is missing.

Classmate: Yeah me too. I Heard the butler found her gone with the door open.

Prissy follower: OH MY GOD! Who will help us with the spring dance!

Followers: Oh my god your right! Without Claire we doomed for social down fall! We like, so don't even have a concept for the dance.

All of Claire's followers looked at each other and screamed.

Bertha: What if Lydia was kidnapped too?

Suddenly Ms. Shannon burst into the room.

Ms. Shannon: Quiet down, quiet down. I have a few announcements. You may have already heard but Claire Brewster is missing.

Bertha raised her hand eagerly.

Ms. Shannon pointed to her in recognition.

Bertha: What about Lydia?

Ms. Shannon: Lydia lost a dear friend in the hurricane and won't be with us today.

Followers: What about us? Claire is missing, how come we have to come to school!

Ms. Shannon looked at them a bit surprised.

Ms. Shannon: Excuse me?

Prissy Follower: Nothing. Sorry Ms. Shannon.

Ms. Shannon: Despite the recent events, let's open our text books to page 346.

Later that day at lunch.

Kyle walked around the lunch room and out side to the other hang-out spots of the students looking for the dark haired girl, wanting to make sure she wasn't real. Suddenly he saw a thin girl sitting with her back to him and her arms out in meditation. Her long black hair moved with the slow breeze. He quickened his pace to catch her before she thought about leaving. He stood right behind her and grabbed her shoulder to get her attention.

The dark haired girl jumped out of surprise and without looking at him, turned around and punched Kyle in the face knocking him onto the grass of the soccer field.

Girl: What the hell do YOU want? You jocks are all the same, no respect for a ladies personal space.

Kyle attempted to get a good look at her with his one un-injured eye.

She stood up leering at him with an insulted sneer on her face. She was much taller then the girl in his dream. Her hair was somewhat flat and thin, she had it tucked behind her ears so the wind wouldn't blow it in her face. Her faded blue and heartless eyes were covered in dark black mascara. She wore a lot of crosses on her person. Cross ear rings, cross necklace, ring with a cross on it. And her back pack and diary had a cross on it too. This was definitely not the warm hearted girl of his dreams.

Kyle: Sorry, I thought you were someone else.

Girl: Well in case you get confused again, I am Samantha. Be afraid, be very afraid. And don't ever touch me again, or next time I'll put you in so much pain, you'll WISH you were the opposite sex when I'm done with you…If you catch my drift.

Kyle: Yeah…sure…

Kyle stumbled up to his feet as he got as far away from her as possible.

Kyle: Yikes, Psycho Bi-.

Jock: HAHAHAHAHAHA! Look what the black cat dragged in. Dude you must be new if you're hittin on that old wench.

Kyle: No I-

Jock: Dude she's the scariest girl in school. Probably not into guys if ya know what I mean. Plus people say she's a real witch too. Literally, you're lucky she didn't turn you into a frog or something.

Kyle: That bad huh?

The jock nodded agreeably with his eyes wide open. She's got a bear trap hidden in her underwear.

Kyle forced a laughed at his remark, trying not to make the jock's attempt at friendship seem too immature.

Kyle: Well I gotta go. But thanks for the warning. What was your name?

Jock: Well, um, you got a pen?

Kyle: Why? Can't you say it?

Jock: It's hard for most people to pronounce it, so I'll just right it down.

Kyle: Yeah um ok. Here.

The jock scribbled on the paper.

Jock: There. Don't say it too much, or you'll wear it out.

Kyle: OK…um-

Kyle tried to read the pronunciation of the name on the note.

Jock: My friends just call me B-man. Use that.

Kyle: Ok. (What a strange guy)

Kyle continued his search and passed by a blonde haired girl that he didn't even bother looking at. As he passed by she watched his every move with a passionate manner.

Lacey: Oh Kyle…sigh.

Suddenly Samantha came from the other side of the hill and slowly stopped in her tracks as she watched her best friend's gaze follow Kyle's every move as he walked back into the school building.

Samantha: OH brother! Don't tell me you like him! Join the waiting list. Every other girl in school has been drooling over that sad excuse of a new guy. Especially Claire Brewster, What she wants, daddy gets her. So you can forget having him Lace.

Lacey: Yeah well I'm feeling lucky today, I think he'll notice me today.

Samantha: And why the hell do you think that?

Lacey: Claire Brewster is missing.

Samantha: Really... that's amazing. I bet you anything whoever took her, brings her back without a ransom. I know I would.

Lacey: I hope they keep her until she learns some real emotions.

Samantha watched Lacey stare longingly at the door Kyle went into.

Samantha: Just go talk to him. It's the perfect chance. Besides I think he's looking for someone, a girl to claim as his own. Without Claire around to annoy him I bet he can't wait to put someone next to him to get Claire off his back.

Lacey smiled a bit at the thought and then became bright red with blush.

Lacey: OH NO! I can't go talk to him, I'll choke up! He'll laugh at me. I'll look so stupid in front of him and he'll tell his friends how goofy I am. And I'll be forever ruined!

Samantha rolled her eyes at Lacey's over reaction.

Samantha: How about we do a confidence spell for you? We got 20 minutes until the bell rings.

Lacey: Well…

Samantha: OH COME ON! You know you want to!

Samantha immediately grabbed Lacey's hands and began to chant.

Claire Brewster screamed with her eyes shut as tight as possible as she endured the twirling and tossing of the trip through the vortex, which for everyone's first time, seems like an eternity, for Lydia and Beetlejuice it was merely a moments time, if that.

The twirling ceased and Claire continued to scream until finally her lungs could eject no more air for her to scream with. Betel-cat held his cut-up ears down until her screeching voice stopped.

Claire: AAAAAAAAAaaaaa..aahhhhhhh…h…hhh…hhh……h…

The silence caused Betel-cat to look up at her and make sure she hadn't imploded from her own frequency.

Betelguese: Ugh. Fina-

Claire sucked in a deep breathe and the color of her face returned to normal.

Claire: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

She continued screaming still not realizing she had stopped falling through a vortex. Betelguese was so taken by surprise at her continuance that he changed back to his true form on accident. The sound of the transformation caused her to look up and see the cat become an ugly, greasy, dead guy.

Claire: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

The ground around her began to quake from her pitch of voice.

Betelguese amazingly heard a familiar sound in the background, a sound that even himself with all his accumulated evil trembled at.

Betelguese: (Whispering) …sandworms…

He looked down at the screaming girl who sat in front of the awkwardly shaped door that had closed entrance to the portal between the two worlds.

Betelguese: SHUT UP! Yur gonna bring them over to us! Do you wanna die!

Claire sniffled as she tried to stop crying.

Claire: My...sniff…my makeup is all runny…sniff, sniff.

Betelguese could not believe his ears.

Betelguese: Ok, your screaming is attracting BIG scary and… um, unfashionable creatures over to us. Now, do you want to die young…in THAT dress?

Claire: OH my GOD! I CAN'T be caught dead in my BATHROBE! My WHOLE social life will like totally wither! I will never be able to go into public ever again, if my body is recovered in my BATHROBE! WAAAAAAAAAAHH!

Betelguese rubbed his face with his palm in frustration.

Betelguese: The POINT is to SHUT-UP! So we don't DIE!

Before any more words could be exchanged a sandworm pushed its way through the road and stared down at the two potential snacks.

To Be Continued…Separation is Murder Part 3.


	8. Separation is murder pt 3

Separation is Murder

Part 3

Hayl, Qwean Klore!

Across from the roadhouse, the Monster across the street, was humming a country tune, as he packed his rickety old pickup full with his luggage.

M.A.T.S: Well, Poopsie are you ready for your BIG vacation?

Poopsie: Rooo?

M.A.T.S: We're gonna go visit uncle Nowhere, and spend a few months on his Monster Dog Ranch. You remember the ranch? That's where we met. (Flips out an old photo) AWWW you were such a cute little bulldog. You never know, you just might find the poodle of your dreams when we get there heh heh.

Poopsie looked around at the free roaming lawn, and comfy mutt-house.

Poopsie: (Grumble)

Knowing there was no fighting it the bulldog grabbed its dog dish, and favorite chewy bone, and jumped inside of the truck.

M.A.T.S: Awww you're so cute when you're excited Poopsie.

The dog rolled its eyes, and took a nap.

As the Monster packed his remaining bags into the truck, he placed himself behind the steering wheel, and started up his truck. He glanced over at Poopsie, petting his companion's fur.

M.A.T.S: We'll get Beetlejuice for breaking your leg. I'm at my last straw with that ghost.

The monster across the street backed up and headed to the middle of Nowhere.

Meanwhile not so far away in the opposite direction, Betelguese, and Claire stood motionless in the shadow of one of the largest sandworms Betelguese had ever seen. From behind one of its spikes on its narrow head waddled a smaller creature with four eyes and stripes (Much like the sand worm) wearing a necklace of worm teeth.

Betelguese and Claire both gave the exact same confused look, and tilted their heads in curiosity at the same time. The creature slid down the long body of its mount and landed in front of the two bewildered beings that were staring at it.

The creature pointed angrily at Betelguese and shouted some incoherent words at the sand worm.

The sand worm wrapped its tail around Betelguese, and lifted him into the air.

Bg: OH NO YOU DON'T! She's MY hostage! Err err, let go of me!

The creature nodded to the sand worm.

Bg: That's more-

The sandworm tossed Betelguese into the air and smacked him into a home run with its tail directly towards the roadhouse.

Claire hugged her knees as the four foot creature made its way towards her.

Creature: Mogago bo teet la loo.

Her fear ran down her spine as he got closer holding out his tail-like arms.

The fear was so overwhelming that she couldn't find the lung power to scream through all of her crying and confusion.

The creature wrapped her up in a silky material and effortlessly carried her to the top of its mount, then rode off into the desserts of Saturn.

Claire: (Mumbled through fabric) Like what kind of place is this! Am I like, in Africa!

Betelguese crashed into the living room of the road house and nearly creamed Jacques as he danced with some beautiful skeleton girls.

The entire party of ghosts and ghouls stopped in their activities as they watched the very reason they were partying, crash the party.

Bg: (Mumbling into the floor) Ok, now I'm really mad.

Jacques looked around, deciding if he could stand the embarrassment of helping "Beetlejuice" in front of all the people who despised him.

Bg: Ok, my face is only imbedded into the linoleum, don't everyone help me up at once.

Betelguese grew out his stripped spider legs, and pushed and pulled himself free from the body-shaped hole he had created. The grim ghoul gathered his surroundings, read some of the banners, and frowned.

Bg: So, having a party without me huh? No no, that's ok, I'm not offended or anything.

The ghost brushed off pieces of linoleum and dirt off his jacket as everyone backed away as he walked in a circle. He tucked in his spider-like legs and stood in an observing pose. He could smell the fear and embarrassment seeping from everyone in the room. He smirked.

Bg: SO! Is everyone enjoying themselves? Havin a ROCK'in old time?

Is the B-man too much for ya? Ok, I gather I'm not well-liked, HELL! I'm not even surprised! I can recognize half of you Turd-stains, just by the pranks I pulled on ya. Good times, good times. So, the ultimate revenge eh? Not bad, not bad, party in the VERY house that I concocted the schemes and pranks that you all fell victim to. I gotta hand it to you all. You really know how to rub in your hatred for a guy. And I couldn't feel more touched. It may be a party to celebrate me moving on and a bit farther away from you all, but it's still a party dedicated to me. SO, let's all start over, and get to know one another, Mono-e-mono.

The crowd looked at one another awkwardly.

Bg: Whadda ya say? (Evil grin).

Betelguese looked around the room.

Bg: No takers? Well that's ok. You're partying because I'm SO terrible to you all, right? (Crowd nodding) Well I'll give ya something to party about. You think I'm terrible now? I'll show ya JUST how terrible I can be!

Betelguese grew into a spider-like creature and reeked havoc among the party goers. Soon after, he split into two creatures, broke from the roof of the road house, and trampled into the Neither world.

Meanwhile in Saturn…

Grandma Prunejuice rowed her little floating row boat with determination.

Beetlejuice however, felt like a dried up sponge, as he lay sweating from the many suns of Saturn.

Bj: Aren't you even the slightest bit tired? I'm getting tired just from watching you not get tired.

GPj: Don't be such a ninny, why I can row for days. I use to hunt sandworms for weeks at a time, with no rest and no food. And I still hunt sandworms, but for different reasons. I use them as ingredients for my spells, and potions. They have very potent essences in all of their body parts.

Bj: Whatever…when can we eat.

GPj: When we find an oasis, I know of one around here. But as a precaution, don't mingle with any strange women there, and certainly don't speak to any Savages you see there. Ignore every thing there but me and the water.

Cerberus: Roargghh?

GPj: And Cerberus.

Bj: (I could float faster then this old barge), let the lion pull us.

GPj: We're in no rush. I have a Time Lanturn keeping us in real time here, which is why we seem to be going so slow, because as you know Saturn time is dramatically sped up.

Bj: Let the lion pull us Grandma, he's bored. His bored moans are beginning to irritate me!

GPj: FINE! If it'll stop you're obsessive whining! Cerberus, MUSH!

Like a bolt of lightning, Cerberus pulled the small rickety boat through the sandy winds like a bullet through water. Beetlejuice relaxed in his seat at the back of the boat.

Bj: Ahh, this is much better, now we're cruisin.

The boat transformed into a small cruise-like ship at his remark.

Grandma Prunejuice rolled her eyes and folded her arms a tad insulted.

GPj: You know, In my day, I could out sail a sandworm in its prime, I could win a race against any vehicle in my boat. I could hunt the biggest monster in the Neither world in this little boat.

Bj: Yeah that's great Grandma.

Beetlejuice put some sunglasses on and relaxed.

As Prunejuice looked at him a complained about youthful people, she went silent as she noticed something out of the focus of her vision.

GPj: Cerberus go faster you molasses-made monster!

Grandma Prunejuice focused her eyes on the object behind the boat.

GPj: I don't think we're moving at a faster speed, that rock back there isn't getting any farther away. Cerberus, are you running back wards? Pick up the pace!

GPj: That rock is gaining on us. I don't like this…Beetlejuice! Get the spears ready.

Beetlejuice snapped out of his nap, and turned around.

Bj: Gulp. Grandma, that's not a rock. It's a fin.

GPj: You're losing your edge on things son, I've lived out here for four hundred and ninety years and never saw a fin that big!

Bj: It's your newest neighbor, and I'll tell you this, he's not coming to bring us welcoming cookies!

GPj: We're going have to undo this time spell if we're to fight him, or even out run him!

They both looked back as they armed themselves with harpoons. The time spell's force field dissipated, and the sandy winds struck at the backs of their heads. The large fin sank into the sand.

GPj: Where is it?

Suddenly the boat and Cerberus were violently tossed into the air. The boat reverted back to its row boat shape.

Grandma balanced the boat out as it rode the sandy waves made by the giant creature. She glanced up at the beast's angry mouth full of crooked teeth as it pushed its way out of the sand in an attempt to put them at a complete stop.

GPj: GREAT GHOST OF AHAB!

Beetlejuice landed on Cerberus holding on for his afterlife.

Grandma Prunejuice used a harpoon to attach herself to the gigantic beast and climbed up to its head. The beast wriggled it pain and landed on its stomach. Prunejuice stood proud at the top of the titan's head as if she was riding the mast of a huge ship. She looked down at her grandson who lay stomach down, on Cerberus.

GPj: GO! Ride Cerberus to your friend! I'll take this white whale down! HERE! Take the time lantern with you. And come visit me more often, I enjoy our visits!

Cerberus cried out for his master.

GPj: Take care of my grandson for me Cerberus! He's not too bright!

And with that she stabbed the top of the Shark's head with her harpoon causing it to writhe under the stress.

Cerberus bolted towards the 7th sun of Saturn where he could see a small oasis on the horizon. As they rode off, Beetlejuice looked back with some concern for his Grandma. The shark turned onto its back and sank itself into the sand, along with Grandma Prunejuice. His features softened as he watch his only Grandmother sink into the harsh sands of Saturn…fighting.

His expression turned to determination, as he tried to turn his attitude to that of his grandmother's.

Bj: Faster! We'll stock up on water. Then I'll feed my other half to you!

Cerberus licked his chops, and gained some speed.

The monster across the street pulled up to a ranch that looked more like a state prison, with barbed wire, and tall steel walls.

M.A.T.S: Sure has changed since we were here last Poopsie. Looks like Uncle Nowhere, struck at rich with his breeding after all.

They stopped at the gate and waited for the intercom to talk to them.

Voice: Who goes, I say who goes there?

MA.T.S: Well tar nation! Uncle Nowhere! It's yer Nephew!

Uncle N: Well why didn't you, I say, why didn't you say so! Come on in Cowboy!

The gate unlocked and opened as the gears creaked and waned. The monster across the street drove down the narrow dirt road down to a crooked log cabin with a giant tree jutting from the middle of it. The monster got out of his truck and was welcomed by his uncle. The Monster from the middle of Nowhere, was a bit taller then his nephew, and was definitely more built with muscle then his nephew. He wore a tattered bullet-hole filled hat, and had a tattoo on his arm that had the initials M.D.B. for "Monster Dog Breeding." He lightly chewed on the end of a wheat stalk as he spoke.

Uncle N: Well if'n it ain't my FAY-forite nephew! Welcome back, I say welcome back to the ranch!

Poopsie jumped down from the trucks seat to greet Uncle Nowhere.

Uncle N: Aww you've grown SO much since I last saw you! So, how is the little-

The monster from the middle of Nowhere, glanced at Poopsie's leg that lay a bit limp inside of a cast.

M.A.T.S: Remember when I called you about Beetlejuice recently? Yeah, he broke my Poopsie's leg. I need a dog that won't fear Beetlejuice and his antics so Poopsie can relax.

The monster's uncle smiled evilly.

Uncle N: I got quite the selection then. I've made millions from my new dog breeds, and their racing abilities, I have many breeds to choose from, especially for pesky neighbors. But we can do that later, let's sit down and reminisce over a nice large serving of Buckalo.

M.A.T.S: BUCKALO! That's a mighty fine meat! Are you sure I'm not imposing?

Uncle N: No worries, I breed those too. I got plenty of, I say plenty of Buckalo for us to eat it every night if we want. That's where I made a lot of rich and powerful contacts that helped me breed the dogs I have today.

The Monsters entered through a horse shoe-shaped door into the living room.

M.A.T.S: Sure have a lovely house.

The house was basically one huge room, with a giant tree trunk in the middle serving as a bar. The walls were covered in the heads and skins of countless animals, and beasts.

M.A.T.S: Gettin a lot of huntin in I see.

Uncle: Yeah. Life is good for me an Gravedigger.

M.A.T.S: Gravedigger? A new dog?

The two monsters sat at the kitchen table and sipped from mugs filled with brew.

Uncle N: Yeah about a year after you got Poopsie I began breeding something other then Bull dogs…Hell hounds.

M.A.T.S. cupped a hand over his mouth as he nearly choked on his brew.

Uncle N: Come Gravedigger, I got a family friend I want you to meet!

The Monster from across the street, peered into a dog house shaped hole in the far end of the house. Thin glowing yellow eyes opened from a dreary slumber. The eyes blinked and rose in the darkness as the animal stood up. The soft pounding of its foot steps drew closer to the entrance to its Mutt-hole, and the light began to shine on its face revealing sharp thin fangs that lined its entire mouth. As it came further out into the open room, the light revealed a ram-like skull with two rhinoceros-like horns coming from out of the top of the skull, which was mounted onto the top of the dog's menacing head. As he walked further more, the light revealed his full size. Hunching over as it walked it was likely around 6 ft tall. As It came into to full view, it had rib-like bones coming from its body in different places, hoofed hind legs, and a devilish tail that was engulfed in flames. It sat down obediently putting its full height at about eight feet. The beast had a permanent grin of teeth as it peered at its master's nephew.

The Monster from across the street quietly gulped as the Hell hound made its way to its master.

Uncle N: You could take one of these with you. Gravedigger studs excellent litters.

M.A.T.S: When you say powerful contacts, are we talkin who I think we're talking about?

Uncle Nowhere could only smile with happy guilt. The Monster's nephew gulped down his brew.

M.A.T.S: Are they all this…big?

Uncle N: Is that a problem?

M.A.T.S: Well, I have a small home and a small yard, I regrettably need something smaller.

The Monster from the middle of Nowhere rubbed his stubble with his studded gloved hand.

Uncle N: Hmmm. Well, we could breed Poopsie with one of my female Hellhounds. And get an equally aggressive dog at more then half the size.

Gravedigger glanced over at Poopsie and widened its grin. Poopsie tucked into the arms of the monster from across the street in fear.

Uncle N: And maybe we could put some of the bite back into your dog.

M.A.T.S: HOT DIGEDDY! Poopsie, we're finally gonna get that mangy ghost where it counts!

Poopsie: Broark broark!

The next day, the two monsters walked along the open fields of Buckalo, and to the stables where the Hell hounds were kept.

Uncle N: I suggest this'n here. She's my best breeder.

M.A.T.S: She sure is purtty compared to Gravedigger. What's her name?

Uncle N: Enigma.

Enigma looked up from her slumber and took a quick glance at them, then went back to sleep. Poopsie looked at Enigma, then at the monsters, a bit confused.

Uncle N: It could take a month or so to get them acquainted, why not stay here for awhile? I could use the help, and company.

M.A.T.S: Well hot damn! Sure! I miss helping you out on yer ranch! How bout it Poopsie? Yer gonna have a puppy!

Poopsie imagined the ole mutt house and sighed.

M.A.T.S: Then it's settled, we'll stay here with you Uncle Nowhere.

Back in the Neither world…

Within a few days the Neither world was in ruins, burning to the ground. Betelguese had taken over the mayor's castle, and summoned his own minions (Betelgoons) to wreak more havoc among the world of the dead using portal relics hidden in the mayor's giant safe filled with dangerous artifacts. He even unleashed a few new monsters into the Neither world. Betelguese writhed in glee as he watched the Neither world crumble at his feet.

Bg: It was all too easy. I suppose I could thank Beetlejuice for storing up so much anger and aggression…I haven't felt so powerfully filled with juice since that time I convinced the Pagans That witches were all evil! . Not even Satan himself can stop me now. Beetlejuice is being digested, in the stomach of a sandworm somewhere, and Lydia has no means of coming back here. All of my enemies are helpless now. But, I should probably make a few allies while I'm head of everything now. All I have to do is go to Beetlejuice's old friends, and beg them for forgiveness, tell them that an evil Beetlejuice kept me prisoner, killed Lydia, and eventually I defeated him, sent him to Saturn, and I'll use my new powerful artifacts to defeat the monsters I unleashed, everyone will revere me, and I will be legally elected as mayor of this revolting underworld. And once that's all done, with my new "mayor" powers, I'll give them all what they want. They will never question me or my power. And if Beetlejuice ever returns, everyone will think he is the evil "me" trying to come back. I'll make sure of that.

Betelguese imagined his plan unfolding perfectly.

Bg: Why am I so AMAZING!

He shut the window shutters and headed downstairs.  
Bg: It's show time.

Weeks had gone by, and Kyle was convinced that he had examined every girl at school that had so much as a black hair on her arm and still none even came close to resembling…her. He sat at home with the lights off in his Christmas pajama-pants alone in the kitchen, exhaustedly propping his head up over a bowl of cereal he made an hour before, and never touched. The more he thought about her, the more he began to doze off. Finally the lights in the kitchen flicked on, and Kyle's head slipped from his arm and planted face first into his soggy cereal. He quickly sprung up fully awake and looked around as the thickened milk dripped from his eyebrows.

Endri: It's 2:30 A.M. What the hell are you doing in here at this hour?

Endri opened the fridge and pulled out a bottle of vanilla-orange soda as he observed Kyle.

Kyle: Um…

Endri: You're half naked with soggy cereal in your hair, is there something you're not telling me? (Smirking sarcastically)

Kyle: Well… I, uh.

Endri's face went serious and full of annoyance as he deduced what was going on.

Endri: Oh God, what's her name?

Kyle: I, I don't know.

Endri popped the lid to his soda off as his eye brows lowered with disappointment.

Endri: Don't tell me you're obsessed with that girl in your dreams?

Kyle: Ok, then… I won't.

Endri paused and glared at him silently for a moment.

Endri: Should I even try to argue with you?

Kyle: Probably not.

Endri: Ok then, goodnight.

Endri began taking off his coat and shirt as he turned around the corner and headed up stairs to his room.

Endri: And wipe that milk off your face, you look like a melted wedding cake!

Endri shut the door to his room up stairs leaving Kyle in the silence of the house. Kyle thought for a second and peered to the stairs realizing Endri had just come home. He wiped the cereal off of his face with a hand towel hanging from the oven, and darted towards the stairs. He tip toed to Endri's room and listened from behind the door.

Endri: You know, you couldn't sneak up on a def turtle if it was raining. What do you want?

Kyle: You asked me what I was doing up so late? So where have you been? I thought maybe you were home asleep when I got here today.

Endri: I was out big deal.

Kyle: Anything productive?

Endri: Yeah I went to the pet store.

Kyle: We don't have any pets.

Endri: Was being sarcastic. I went out for fun, to get my head cleared.

Kyle: How come you get to stay out late?

Endri: Because I pay the bills and keep you alive.

Kyle: Hey I pull whatever weight you let me pull around here, I'd get a job if you'd let me.

Endri: You know why I can't let you get a job. It puts you in records, and files, and makes us easy to find.

Kyle: So then up my curfew, I deserve it.

Endri: Got any trust worthy friends?

Kyle: I don't have…any at all, just you.

Endri: And what would you do with a longer curfew?

Kyle: I don't know go to the club the kids at school go to.

Endri: That closes to ages 20 and under after midnight, which is your curfew. I win so no deal.

Kyle: Fine, where did you really go?

Endri: …

Kyle: It's hard to be best friends with someone who's so secretive! (Waiting) Fine! Goodnight! Hope she did the trick for you at a fair price!

Kyle went across the hall and opened his bedroom door and Endri was standing there infuriated. Immediately before Kyle could react, Endri had his hand around Kyle's throat lifting him from the floor.

Endri: Listen you little ungrateful S#! You KNOW that's not what I'm out doing! You KNOW I would never pull such a stupid stunt and put us in jeopardy! You KNOW that anything I do benefits us both! And you should KNOW that I deserve some time to unwind after the s# we just went through moving here!

Kyle: (choking) I…Know, ack.

Endri calmed down and loosened his grip on Kyle. A bit surprised at himself.

Endri: I'm-

Kyle: No…cough…just… go to bed, I apologize.

Endri: Kyle-

Kyle: Get away from... (Wheeze) … me.

Endri Walked to his room half angry at Kyle and half at himself for getting out of control. Not knowing which should bother him the most.

Kyle sat on the carpet trying to get his lungs to function properly again, and attempted to stand up and shut his bedroom door.

Kyle: Fu-(SLAM) -er.

Two weeks later…

Charles sat in a chair next to Lydia's bed waiting for her to wake up.

Charles: Pumpkin? Sweet heart, wake up.

Lydia: Beetlejuice?

Charles: Um, no it's me.

Lydia: Oh, hi daddy.

Charles: It's been weeks. I think you should go to school. Maybe it will help clear your mind of things.

Lydia grumbled into her pillow.

Charles: Your mother and I are very concerned, and it would make us feel better if you'd get out of this room, please?

Lydia: …Ok, I'll do it for you.

Charles: Thanks pumpkin. I don't think your friend Betty would want you to mope all day over her anyway.

Lydia: You're probably right.

Charles: We have eggs and toast ready. I'll drive you to school in Delia's car.

Lydia: Thanks daddy.

Lydia sat up in her bed with no make-up and her hair was matted from bed head ten times over.  
Lydia: ugh, I don't think I can do this without you Beej. How am I going to take an exam without a striped pencil? Or ride home on my bike without a bike horn to talk too? Who will I sit with at lunch with out Betty? Who will put spiders in Claire's back pack? …How will I ever find something in my day that makes me smile like you do? How will I ever find a friend like you? Who am I kidding? I can't do this with out you. But I promised daddy.

Lydia sat back on her pillow with one hand on her forehead and thought for a moment.

Lydia: Ok…I'm up.

Lydia went though her closet of hand made and customized clothes she had made for herself over the years trying to pick something out to wear for school.

Claire woke up in a bamboo-like thrown, hovering above 50 of the little creatures who were all chanting in her direction.

Claire: Like, what is going on? What do you ugly little things want from me?

One of the creatures with a bigger head, and more prominently dressed, stood in front of the rest of the crowd to address her.

Savage Chief: Oh gu-rate and poworfool wun, we huv dun oz yoo Far told.

Claire: Like, come again?

Savage Chief: Wut myty furm huv yoo choosen thiss era? Wut naym huv yoo choosen far yoorsulf oh qwean ov Saturn?

Claire: Oh, you like want to know who I am? What am I thinking? How could you NOT want to know who I am? I'm totally like, Claire Brewster.

The Savage Chief turned to his people with raised arms and in his funny accent announced to his people the new reign of their reincarnated queen.

Savage Chief: ULL HAYL! QWEAN KLORE! Thu ULLMYTY BREWER!

Claire: Queen! Well, it's about time someone around here figured out how to treat me.

Savage Chief: Just oz yoo far sah en yoor myty passt lyfe, we woold fynd yoo et a purtol frum anover woarld exackly free hundrayd yurs frum thu tyme ov yur death. I bestoo yoo wiff yoor past riches and myty artiflackts of Past, present, and future! Leed uss agayn en anover prosperous roole!

Claire: Yeah, like, whatever, what is there to eat around here?

Savage Chief: Yess! Feest fur, yoo weel need yoor strayngth en thu arayna. Wee Huv fownd mayny beestses fur yoo to encownturr. Yoo weel gu-row large in powor agaynst yur foallen foes.

Claire: Like, Come again? You're making your queen fight monsters?

Savage Chief: Yoo enstruckted thet evury reincarnaytion, you shoold fyght beastess to gayn yur strayngth.

Claire stared wide eyed at him in disbelief.

Claire: Not a chance in hell!

Savage Chief: Doo not bee soo moadest, yoo must bee bludd firsty frum yoor wary sloomber. Yoo must fool-feel your laws and truditions to apeeze the Sand Keeng.

Claire: Well I obviously didn't know what stress and physical labor could do to your hair back then.

After a bountiful feast, Claire and her thrown were lifted up and carried to the royal changing tent.

Claire was quickly dressed in a tight leathery dress made from sand worm skin, and her hair was cut significantly shorter for the sake of battle. They also equipped her with a long horn on her forehead so she would resemble her followers. They put dark makeup around her eyes to give her the power of intimidation over her foes, equipped her with a blade on a stick, and carried her into the arena where a gigantic cage sat on the other side.

Hundreds of the Saturn Savages cheered and whistled as the cage handlers poked and prodded what ever lurked inside of the covered cage.

Random Savage: I sayee she ates et en wun byte.

She Savage: No wayee, she weel joomp en ets thu-roat and ate ets ensydes lyke last tyme.

Claire could over-hear the many expectations of her subjects and gulped in disbelief.

Claire: Like, this is TOTALLY NOT sociably acceptable!

Silence struck the crowd as the beast growled from inside its cage. The pins from the cage locks were removed and the crowd waited for the creature to bust through the cage gate. Claire tried desperately to figure out how to hold the spear-like weapon assigned to her. The creature roared loudly, and the cage door slowly fell to the ground revealing darkness inside the cage.

Light hit the creature's head as it slithered from the cover of the cage.

Claire: Like, you have got to be totally kidding me!

Sand Snake: SSSSSssthhhh.

The crowd gasped at the sight of this new creature.

The gasp caught the attention of the snake and Claire attempted to throw the spear at the monster. The spear landed two feet in front of her, but she was glad that she didn't get the animal's attention.

Crowd: KLORE, KLORE, KLORE, KLORE!

The sand snake sniffed at the metal fence that was distancing him from the other creatures, and then looked down at Claire who immediately shrieked. The sand snake lunged in for her and Claire cringed and held out one hand.

Sand Snake: SSSRRAAAAGGGHHH! YYYIIIIISSSSTHHHH!

Claire peered from behind her shoulder to see the snake flopping around in shear pain. Looking at her hand she was holding down the button to her pepper spray that she pulled from her purse out of reflex.

Claire: I guess those boring self defense classes like, really paid off.

The snake slithered back into the cage and curled into a nervous coil whimpering.

The crowd fell silent for a moment of awe, then cheered dramatically.

Savage Chief: Hayl Qwean Klore! Brewer ov paynfool madgick!

It was then that Claire's ignorance of her dumb luck became an inflated evil ego.

A few days later…

Cerberus plopped under the shade of a crooked palm tree, panting.

Bj: Good boy, I'll get you some water.

Beetlejuice slipped off of Cerberus' back, and dragged his feet over to a watering hole. Carrying the time lantern he thought and paused.

Bj: You're gonna have to follow me, or for you It'll become hours before I bring you water.

Cerberus dragged his body with his fore legs and plunked his face into the watering hole.

Bj: Save some for the road home guzzle gut.

Beetlejuice sat up against Cerberus' side and looked at the lantern as he drank from the flask.

Bj: It's a shame this thing doesn't slow down time around us, that way we'd be going really fast. It sucks having to travel so slowly, even though when you think about it, were getting there faster then if we didn't have this thing with us. It's so darn hard to navigate in this waste land when everything outside that bubble is moving so freakin fast. Ah what do you care? You don't even understand half of what I'm complaining about.

Suddenly the lantern's light began to flicker, and the bubble began to fade.

Bj: This stupid thing has been flickering on and off all day, it's really starting to bug me.

The lantern's light finally extinguished and failed to rekindle itself.

Bj: Uh oh.

Suddenly a couple of spears struck into a tree next to Beetlejuice's face.

The savages pushed their way from out of the bushes. Upon looking at the ghoul, their eyes widened and they instantly became hostile to Beetljuice.

Bj: OW! WATCH WHERE YER POKIN THAT THING!

Savage warrior: Ragakk! Ragakk!

Bj: Your mother!

The savages didn't understand him, but the tone of his voice told them it was an insult, which they didn't take kindly to.

Later…

The Saturn Savages danced around a pole with a bon fire burning at the base with Beetlejuice tied to it.

Bj: Random natives, ya know I hatem.

The Savages stopped dancing as the Savage Chief approached Beetlejuice. The Savage Chief had a larger horn on his head then the rest of his people, and a large swollen throat gland, much like a frogs, but floppier.

Bj: Hey, I have a friend who knows a really good witch doctor who can shrink that head of yours down a bit for a pretty good price.

Savage Chief: ENUFF! Yoo ure thu wun who held our qwean husstedge.

And now yoo seek to steel hur bawk? Wee shull see how she reakcts to your fase wunce we let hur deside yoor demiz.

Bj: Hey! You got the wrong guy! I don't know any queens! Just let me go! I have a friend to save! Don't touch me!

The creatures put the fire out, and carried Beetlejuice attached to the pole over to their royal court yard. They placed the pole back up vertically with Beetlejuice facing in the direction of their queen.

Savage Chief: Gu-rate Qwean Klore, we breeng yoo an entroodurr.

Klore stood up from underneath the giant fanning palm leaves and walked forward to get a better view of her prisoner. Klore looked Beetlejuice over with a disgusted sneer.

Queen Klore: How could you let such a filthy person into my kingdom!

Savage Chief: I em surry your qweanlynuss. But hee iz the mann thet huld you husstedge when we fownd yoo.

Klore glared down at Beetlejuice.

Queen Klore: Like, now I remember. I totally applaud your efforts to come and kidnap me again, but your long search ends like, right now, I will feed you to my newest monster. I call it, the ocean-less shark.

Beetlejuice glanced up at Klore, and went pale.

Bj: CLAIRE!

Queen Klore: I was once known as Claire, but my followers have like, awakened me, and shown me who I really am. I am Queen Klore, the mighty Brewer.

Bj: uh, yeah sure, look, I'm not here to kidnap you, in fact I don't recall ever kidnapping you, I'm stuck out in this waste land of a dessert and am trying to get back to Lydia. I could take you home too if you help me.

Klore thought for a moment and then snapped her fingers, causing two chained up sand worms to come to her. She cuddled their snouts as she devised her next actions.

Bj: That is by FAR, the scariest thing I have ever seen. Claire, and sandworms. She could win the ghost with the most contests with that act.

Queen Klore: Like, silence you! I think you are lying to me. I will feed you to my Oceanless shark now.

Shortly afterwards, Beetlejuice was strung up onto a wire and hung above a pool of sand.

Beetlejuice wasn't even thinking about his demise at this point in time, but about Lydia, and if she was even alive. If she was alive, how long has he been missing from her? If he ever gets back, what will she say? What will he be able to say? How old will she be if he ever makes it back?

Bj: I probably failed her. She's going to die a lonely old woman, and never know what happened to me. What if she's forgotten about me?

Queen Klore: (Ugh, WHAT is he babbling about up there?) Like, WHERE is the monster?

Klore folded her arms as bait was thrown out to lure the creature.

Queen Klore: This better work or I will throw one of you worthless peasants out there!

Bj: HEY! PRINCESS! WHY AREN'T I DEAD YET!

Klore gasped and placed a limp-wristed palm on her chest.

Queen Klore: HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT! I WILL SEE TO IT THAT YOU ROTT IN A JAIL CELL AFTER THIS THING LIKE, DIGESTS YOUR REMAINS!

Bj: You call this a torture! It's more like a 5 star hotel if you ask me!

Queen Klore: WHAT is taking like, SO FRIGGIN LONG!

Silence filled the area for a moment.

Queen Klore: Chief, like, you DID CATCH the shark right?

Savage Chief: No dowt myee qwean.

Queen Klore: SO like, why is HE still alive?

The sand began to shift and everyone present leaned forward with anticipation.

Suddenly an old withered hand reached from under the sand. Soon after, another one grasping a harpoon, surfaced.

Grandma Prunejuice dug her way from out under the sand, stud up proudly and screamed.

GPj: WOW! Wrap that thing up in a doggy-bag, I'm taking it home! I've never had to fight a monster from inside its belly before, that son of a fish put up the best fight I ever-

Prunejuice paused and looked around. She slowly brushed some of the sand off from her blouse.

Bj: GRANDMA! UP HERE!

GPj: You stupid boy! I told you not to talk to the natives!

Bj: They speared me!

GPj: You savages! You want something worth your while to torture! Then come and get some.

Queen Klore: Like, arrest that old hag!

GPj: HAG!

The creatures charged right for her in large groups. Prunejuice pushed a button on her harpoon releasing a scythe-like blade, and started be-heading the creatures one by one.

Bj: Whoa, Ninja Granny.

Suddenly an earth shattering voice penetrated the area causing everyone to fall on their backs.

Woman: ENOUGH!

Savage Chief: Et kan't be.

Savages: Qwean Shakalaka…(gasp)

An almost stick-figure thin woman striped in white and grey from head to toe, with a large thin and curly horn protruding from her head, stood hunched over from her announcement, her hair was frizzled from the long travel in the dessert.

Mohambo: I am called Mohambo now. I was reborn as I specified, where were YOU!

Savage Chief: I uh, she, thu, thaym we ure, whuz.

The Chief pointed nervously at Beetlejuice and Claire.

Mohambo: You mistook this HUMAN to be ME? She doesn't even have a real horn!

Mohambo threw Claire's fake horn into the sand and pushed her down, immediately turning towards the Chief.

Mohambo: I have the right mind to throw you to my sandworms! I have been traveling for days! Riding sandworms until exhaustion from oasis to oasis trying to be rescued, but you were too busy entertaining a HUMAN!

Savage Chief: I, I, I

Mohambo snapped her fingers twice and the two sand worms leapt from the bushes and ripped the chief in half.

Bj: I think that's our queue to make like trees and leaf.

Beetlejuice turned into a leaf and drifted from his shackles and next to his grandma, then poofed back to his regular self.

Bj: As much as I might regret this, we gotta take the "Ex- queen" with us.

GPj: (Grumble)

Prunejuice rolled her eyes at the thought.

Prunejuice whistled and Cerberus jumped from the bushes.

GPj: Let's go girly!

Mohambo: Don't let them escape! We can't let them reveal us to others!

Claire: Like, what the hell?

Beetlejuice snatched Claire as he jumped onto Cerberus' back.

GPj: MUSH!

The trio rode off into the sandy wind and disappeared into the horizon.

Mohambo: I won't forget this! I'll make you ghosts PAY for your intrusion! I don't care how many sandworms it takes, I will see all of you ghosts in inexistence!

Meanwhile back in the "New" Neither world…

Bitey scurried along the underside of what used to be Doomy. Looking for a way out of the garage-like area he was in. The little bat was beginning to feel his stomach shrivel from lack of nutrition.

Bitey: Squee…

It had been nearly 3 months since he was stored in here with ex-Doomy, and about a week since he finished all of the edible things in here off, including the bugs and rodents. Then he thought if the big people could make this thing go, then maybe he could figure it out. Bitey climbed into the driver's seat and looked at all of the knobs and levers trying to make sense of it all. Then an epiphany struck the little bat. Bitey quickly jumped to the top of the windshield looking for anything that could be considered even the slightest bit edible for him. Peering into the dark corners of the garage he spotted a can of liquid that resembled a pitcher of juice that read "Gasoline". Not being able to read the can, he scurried down to it and chugged the entire canister of vile liquid.

Bitey: BLECK!

The creature began to swell and then glow. He quickly waddled over the vehicle and bit into its back fender ejecting every last essence of the fluid into the car. He stood back waiting for the possibly violent results.

The car glowed in the dark for a brief moment. Then the car began to move a bit, like it was looking around. Bitey sprinted to the car hood to see if it worked.

Bitey: Squeek?

Doomy: HONK!

Bitey: Squee! Squeeeee!

Doomy: Honk honk!

Bitey: Squeek!

Doomy: MEEEP MEEEPP! VVRRROOOMMM!

The car started up as the bat creature jumped onto the steering weel. After a few moments, Bitey looked around waiting for Doomy to go forward.

Doomy: Honk MEEP-meep.

Bitey looked around and saw the garage opener, reached for it and pressed the big red button. The garage door slowly lifted revealing the orange Neither world skies which were in the process of blackening completely from some evil source.

Doomy thought about Lydia and Beetlejuice and began to get angry as he thought about Betelguese. Bitey became startled and let go of the steering wheel as soon as it turned into fur. Doomy quickly transformed into his wear-dragster form.

Doomy: RONK, ROOOONK!

Bitey fastened his seat belt and prepared for the worst motion sickness of his existence.

The dragster darted through the narrow winding roads of the Neither world heading for the road house.

It had been about two weeks, and just like the other 13 mornings, the ride to school seemed to be longer then the last, and even more awkward and ear numbingly silent then the morning before. Kyle could spot the school entrance and ironically gripped his backpack with excitement that this part of his day was about to end.

Endri: Just hold your horses. We have to talk.

Kyle groaned inside of his head. He knew this was going to be sappy, as was the tradition when it came to having heart-to-heart talks with Endri. Not only that, he was going to be late for the one class he enjoyed, P.E.

Kyle slowly took his gaze from the window, and turned towards Endri.

Endri: Look me in the eyes…look, I'm sorry I grabbed you like that the other night. It was hasty and wrong of me. Not only that, I crossed a pact that I made, way back when I found you. I told myself I would never let anything harm you, and I found myself becoming that thing that I swore to protect you against.

Kyle almost hated the thought of forgiving him, but it was a good explanation.

Endri: But, on my defense, you promised me along time ago, that you would never bring up that part of my past again. We had forgiven and forgotten about that dark chapter in our lives. So in a way, we're even. We both broke a promise.

Kyle nodded which looked more like pointing his head at the floor.

Endri: I don't deal with those "sort" of women anymore. You showed me that I didn't need that false satisfaction years ago. I honestly went to the pet store the other night, and looked around to clear my mind and entertain the existence of something other then my problems. So, forgive me?

Kyle looked Endri in the eyes then back at the school as the bell rang. He refrained from looking back at Endri, not to seem cold, but because he was holding back a choking feeling in his throat, and looking at Endri would make it worse.

Kyle: Yeah, forgiven. I was wrong to say such things in my fit of jealousy.

His tears subsided as he felt some humor. He turned towards Endri as he opened the door.

Kyle: Heh heh, but you know how moody I get this time of month.

Kyle looked at Endri with a smile, and left the vehicle. But instead of Endri laughing, or giving it any gesture, his face went monotone and his eyes widened slightly, as Kyle's remark reminded him that he had forgotten about something entirely. Once Kyle was out of sight Endri peeled out in the jeep.

Endri raced back home with his face nearly up against the windshield as he drove at dangerous speeds through the suburban neighborhood.

Endir: HOW COULD I FORGET! Ah man! With all the crap I had to do to move us here, it's no wonder I completely spaced it!

Endri spun the jeep into a 180 spin and parallel parked it on the front lawn.

Endri: Damn damn damn!

Endri ran into the house and locked the door behind him.

Samantha: You have to relax your head, errg! LACEY! Are you even going to try this with me!

Lacey: Oh, um, sorry Sam. I was just…thinking…of…happy, things, like, cats, and…chanting.

Samantha: Who do you think you're fooling? You're thinking about Kyle, AGAIN! If you want the courage to talk to him at lunch, I need you to concentrate with me, and finish this spell.

Lacey: OK. Black as night, um… line?

Samantha: Just do the humming thing. I'll chant. Black as night, things of fright, turn our wrongs into rights. We-

Teacher: Girls, I need you to stop talking amongst yourselves and pay attention to the lesson. I said you could sit on the bean-bag chairs if you would listen.

Lacey: Sorry.

Samantha still sat in chanting pose and rolled her eyes, as Lacey put her hands in her lap and sat upright facing the board.

Samantha: Son of a-

The lunch bell rang out the new hour and the students from Ms. Shannon's trailer marched in a single-file line to the cafeteria.

A few of the senior jocks whistled and howled at the girls in uniform, as they marched to lunch.

Ms. Shannon smacked one across the lips with her yard stick as she passed by, causing the boy to fall on his back.

Jock's friend: Holy Sh-

Lydia walked to the back of the building just as the lunch bell was ringing wearing her tight jeans with spider webs drawn down the legs in permanent marker. She wore her hair half covering her face so that she'd have less chance of being noticed by others to avoid social interaction. She didn't feel like talking to anyone but Beetlejuice. She was alone in the world as of today, and intended on carrying on just the same as before she had met Beetlejuice. But then it was all ruined as she neared the corner.

Lydia: ACK! Oof!

Kyle: whoah- ugh!

They had both walked along the wall in their depression, and crashed head first into each other at the corner.

Kyle: I'm so sor-

Kyle looked at the girl as he reached for a book to help her re organize her dropped items and paused in fright, and surprise in her presence.

Lydia: I'm SO sorry, I wasn't paying attention, I-

Lydia looked at the be-fumbled boy sitting in a mud puddle staring wide-eyed at her.

Lydia: Are you ok?

Kyle: …

Lydia: Hello?

Kyle: …

Lydia: You're that boy who works for the F.B.I. …

Kyle: …

Lydia: Ok, well nice seeing you again. Bye.

Kyle: …

Lydia turned to look at him as she walked into the cafeteria.

Lydia: That was weird.

She stood in line and thought about Beetlejuice as she ignored the lunch ladies questions.

Lunch lady: You want mashed potatoes? … whatever.

Sitting down at an empty table, she pulled out her sketch book and began doodling in it as she took a bite of her pizza slice. Her privacy was quickly interrupted.

Bertha: LYDIA!

Lydia jumped out of her daze a bit startled.

Prudence and Bertha walked to her table with their trays.

Prudence: Why weren't you in class today?

Lydia: I only came to school because my parents were worried about me moping around, I didn't feel like playing the whole school girl bit today.

Bertha: I'm sorry about Betty Lydia.

Prudence: We heard from Ms. Shannon.

Lydia: Thanks guys. But if you don't mind, I'd like to be left alone for awhile.

Bertha: Um, ok

Prudence: Of course Lydia. Come say hi when you feel up to it.

Lydia: Thanks for understanding.

Lydia watched them join their own new click of chess club members and algebra team mates.

Lydia Drew a little man with long hair, and then colored black stripes on his suit.

Lydia: What happened to you?

She began to day dream about him and their past adventures trying not to cry.

Suddenly she felt something much like an epiphany but more subtle, it felt like she had a blip on her Beetlejuice senses, assuming she had such senses.

She quickly gathered her things and walked as quickly as she could to the ladies bathroom. After checking all of the stalls, she sat in the far handicapped one. Swallowed the lump in her throat and took a deep breathe. Her heart pounded at the thought of those words.

Lydia: Though I know I should be weary, still I venture someplace scary, ghostly haunting I let loose! Beetlejuice…Beetlejuice…gulp…BeetleJUICE!

She flinched her eyes waiting for a flash or a teleportation. The bathroom seemed to darken. She watched as she imagined the room becoming a bathroom in the Neither world. But to her dismay, the darker atmosphere was only in her mind. Nothing happened. She pulled her legs up onto the toilet as her head collapsed into her palms, sobbing.

The bell rang causing Kyle to wince.

Kyle: Wha-

Looking at the others filing into the school building, he smacked his forehead.

Kyle: I'm so- STUPID!

He frantically pulled himself from the puddle of half-dried mud, and ran for the doors, hoping she would still be eating.

Kyle barged into the cafeteria looking around frantically.

Kyle: Damn it! Not now!

He almost sprinted for the hall way when something stopped him. He replayed their graceful crash in his mind.

Kyle: Oh you have to be kidding me! Her!

Kyle smacked his forehead once again.

Kyle: OWW!

He sat lazily in one of the plastic lunch room chairs, almost grumpy from his discovery as the room emptied.

Kyle: This is NOT going to go over well with him.

Then Kyle smiled.

Kyle: But on the plus side, I already know her name, and where she lives!

He jumped up onto the table and screamed for joy, his weight caused the foldable table to collapse under the force of his jump.

Kyle: OWW! … ugh, damn it.

Getting half way to his feet he sighed from relief that no one was around to see him biff it.

Kyle: Maybe, she has B lunch! I'll skip 4th period, and wait here for her.

But she never showed, not even for C lunch.

Kyle: Maybe I imagined it all. No that's not possible, because then I wouldn't have figured out who she was.

Kyle headed to 6th period with his head hung low.

Later…

Lydia cuddled her bag as she exited the school entrance a few minutes early then the bell. Suddenly she saw a long haired man in a dark grey and light grey striped suit sitting on a bench with his back to her.

Lydia: Beetlejuice? BEETLEJUICE!

Lydia ran towards him calling out to him.

He stood and turned as her voice reached him. Before he could get a glance at her, she had her arms wrapped around his waist.

Lydia: OH BEEJ, I had a feeling the summoning would work, I felt that it would!

Endri: What the hell? Who are you?

Lydia let go of his waist immediately and looked at him.

Lydia: Who are you?

Endri: I asked you first. I have the right to know first since you hugged me and all.

Lydia: My name's…Lydia Deetz. So you don't know me?

Endri: Now that I look you over again, yes I do know you.

Lydia: (But he looks so much like Beetlejuice. But taller.)

Lydia: How do you know me? Do you know Beet-

Endri: You're that girl whose house we investigated.

Lydia: Are you guys following me!

Endri: What are you talking about? I'm here to pick up Kyle from school.

Lydia: As in agent K? He REALLY goes to my school! My day just keeps getting better.

Before Endri could fit in another sentence Lydia stormed off towards the bike rack.

Endri: Sheesh must be her time of month too. Everyone around here is so edgy.

Endri waited for Kyle to walk through the doors.

Endri: Come on kid we got three hours.

Endri looked at his watch then at the school doors.

Endri: We're burning day light. Where is he?

Kyle came from the other corner near the bike racks and noticed the Jeep parked out front.

Kyle: I can't go home yet, I haven't found her-.

Kyle looked over to his right and saw Lydia unchaining her bike.

Kyle: HEY!

Lydia looked up and saw Kyle running to her.

Lydia: Now what!

Kyle slowed down to a walk as he approached her. And smiled with the most charming smile he could muster.

Lydia: What do YOU want? My birth certificate?

Kyle: I'd settle for your phone number.

Lyida: You mean you don't already have my phone line tapped?

Kyle: Look, we aren't from the F.B.I. were, sigh, supernatural investigators. HEY, I'm just being honest.

Lydia raised one eye brow in distrust.

Kyle: Can we start over? Hi, I'm Kyle, Kyle Bennington.

He reached his hand out for a welcoming shake but Lydia just glared at him.

Endr looked to his left and saw Kyle trying to shake her hand.

Endri: What the hell is he doing? …oh god, don't tell me that's her.

Lydia: What do you guys want with me?

Kyle: Aside from our business, I'd settle for a friendship.

Lydia: Well I have nothing to share with you about my supernatural experiences.

Kyle: That's fine. How about we talk about something more interesting? Like you favorite restaurant? (Wink)

Lydia couldn't help but smirk at his persistence.

Lydia: Are you asking me out on a date?

Kyle put his hands in his pockets and looked around nervously as he smiled with guilt.

Kyle: Yes.

Lydia: Then … no.

Kyle paused in surprise.

Kyle: Why not?

Lydia: My decision is final, no negotiations. See you around. I have my eye on you.

Lydia rode off with a smug smile.

Kyle: I got my eyes on you, heh heh.

Kyle headed over to the jeep not sure if he was just rejected completely or if she was playing hard to get. Either way he was overjoyed that he was able to talk to her. He ran over to Endri with enthusiasm.

Kyle: Endri! She-

Endri: Is simply out of the question.

Kyle: OH, I knew you'd do this.

Endri: Oh really? Am I so predictable?

Kyle: When it comes to me being any fraction of happy, yes you are.

Endri: You can't date her, we're investigating her. What if she's an enemy?

Kyle: Look if I date her, she'll open up and share her secrets with me.

Endri: Oh please, you're saying that to convince me you're doing this for reasons other then hormones. As if you've ever put any real effort into our search.

Kyle: I have! I made the gadgets didn't I! That takes a lot of research and time mind you! I don't just pull them out of cereal boxes!

Endri: Could have fooled me.

Kyle's face went bright red with anger.

Endri: I'm just joking. Look I'm just giving you hard time. If you REALLY like her, and think she's of some importance, then you can go ahead and try to date her. But from the looks of it Bo peep knows what a wolf in sheep skin looks like.

Kyle: Whatever. Let's go home I'm in the mood for pork chops suddenly.

Endri: I know you are. I suppose you'll want it wrapped in bacon too?

Kyle: How'd you know?

Endri: You always ask for it at the last second. We can stop at the store, my treat for choking you and all I guess.

Kyle: Seems fair enough.

Endri: You get to clean the dishes though, let's not forget you were at fault too.

Kyle: Just drive, I'm sick of looking at this school for today.

Samantha and Lacey watched the busses drive off as they walked home.

Samantha: What a bunch of sheep. Hey Lace, you know what tonight is?

Lacey: Um, it's not your birthday is it?

Samantha: Of course not! That's not until October. You know that.

Lacey: Sorry, I'm just kind of spaced out. I never even got to see him today.

Samantha: Sometimes I swear you're a guy, always thinking about the opposite sex.

Lacey: No this is different, I'm a hopeless romantic, there's a big difference.

Samantha: Sure. Well anyway, the moon will be half full tonight, perfect for conjuring the spirits who are preparing for the full moon. And we can rent all kinds of scary movies, you know, have a sleep over, like when we were 13.

Lacey: Really? I guess that sounds fun. Yeah sure, come over to my house, and my mom will make us a bunch of goodies. And we can try and connect with lost loved ones. I like when we do that. It's like finding old memories that suddenly come to life.

Samantha: And I was worried you were beginning to loose interest in the craft. Silly me. Let's stop at the gas station and stock up on junk food.

Lacey: OK!

Samantha: (Finally got her mind off of that retarded jock for brains.) Nothing says "happiness" to a depressed girl like ice cream and chocolate.

Lacey: Amen!

Boy: Excuse me.

Samantha: What do you want Jock s8#!

Boy: Hi, sorry my name, well just call me B-man. I was wondering if you saw a white haired guy come this way?

Lacey: You must mean Kyle. No we haven't seen him today. Sorry.

B-man: Thanks, sorry to bug you.

Samantha: What a freak job. Who is he kidding with that gothy-punk-jock look? He's going to find himself in the middle of a lot of stereotypical drama. I just hope I get a good seat to the show.

Lacey: If he cut his hair, and put on some thing a little less dramatic he'd be kinda cute.

Samantha: HA! I knew it you're a sex fiend! It's not just for Kyle.

Lacey: (sarcastically)HA HA…can we drop this? Just because you hate men doesn't mean I have to.

Samantha: I don't hate all men, just the morons at school. I have my turn ons, and none of them go to our school.

Lacey: OK get realistic, Marlyn Manson, isn't coming to Peaceful Pines to date you.

Samantha: Hey, I'd settle for a look-a-like. Who says I want to date any way?

Clerk: 12.95, thank you.

Lacey: man that's a lot of junk food.

Samantha: We'll enjoy every last pound of it too.

They proceeded to walk down the street and into the sub-division. Samantha screamed out a curse word to a car that nearly hit them on their way in.

Back in the Neither world… a few days later.

The Monster form across the street sat at the bar sipping a hot chocolate in his red long-johns.

Uncle N: Nephew, I got something to run your way.

M.A.T.S: What is it?

Uncle N: Poopsie isn't getting along with Enigma, Nor she to Poopsie.

M.A.T.S: Well why not?

Uncle N: Follow me.

He escorted his Nephew to the stables. Uncle Nowhere pointed over to Gravedigger's pen. To the Monsters across the streets surprise, Poopsie sat cuddled in between the large arms of Gravedigger. His mouth fell open as he was about to take a drink of his cocoa, spilling it into his crotch. But the shock of this site was more dramatic then the searing pain from the cocoa.

M.A.T.S: You mean Poopsie likes other boy-dogs!

Uncle N: What! No I say No! Poopsie is a girl!

M.A.T.S: How could this happen, I picked out a boy pup when I got Poopsie.

Uncle N: Well, I may have mixed up the dog you picked out for one someone else did, or grabbed the wrong one.

The Monsters Nephew gave out a relived sigh.

M.A.T.S: Well at least my dog didn't turn out to be a non-breeding dog. So, is the pup still going to be a smaller?

Uncle N: Oh yes of course! Maybe a bit bigger then originally planned, seeing how these two decided to get together, but, all in all it won't be very big at full maturity. But for your own safety I don't recommend leaving until Poopsie has her puppies. That way Gravedigger won't get upset about the separation. He's not the type you want to upset.

M.A.T.S: Won't he get mad when I take Poopsie and a puppu?

Uncle: Oh no! Once the male has done his job of studding, he protects the mother until she gives birth. But, if Poopsie doesn't deliver young then he'll try again. So we'll leave them until Poopsie is ready.

M.A.T.S: If you say so.

After a few days of traveling in Saturn, Beetlejuice and his grandmother were ready to grab something to eat. Beetlejuice and Prunejuice arrived at dawn. As soon as the sunlight hit the city, they both gawked in astonishment.

Bj: Woah. Place sure has changed a lot since I was last here…HOW LONG WAS I GONE!

GPj: Well we were traveling for about three days time in Saturn, because you lost my lantern! I'd say roughly 2 years.

Bj: 2 YEARS!

Claire: 2 years! I'm like totally suppose to be a junior in high school right now! OH MY GOD! Have I missed the PROM! How am I going to explain to everyone that I was kidnapped and taken to Africa!

GPj: Don't worry Son, I'll take care of her, you go get your powers back or whatever it is.

Beetlejuice flew down the even more deranged streets of the New Neitherworld.

Prunejuice blew some powder from a pouch on her side into Claire's face.

Before she could think, Claire fell asleep.

GPj: Now to get you home.

A few hours later, in the outer world, a couple of paramedics discovered Claire lying on a stretch bed.

Paramedic: Holy cow! Who left her sitting here! Get her into E.R.!

Claire woke up a few hours later in a hospital room.

Claire: Like, where am I? What a head ache! OW!

The nurse came running in.

Nurse: How are you feeling sweetie pie?

Claire: Like, I feel crappy what do you think?

Nurse: How many fingers am I holding up?

Claire: Well, you're wearing press on nails, and the third one in is shorter then the others.

Nurse: Um, ok, good enough. What happened darlin?

Claire: I was kidnapped, and taken to Africa.

The Nurse starred blankly in disbelief.

Nurse: Well, ok dear whatever you say. You're back here in the U.S.A now.

Claire: Good.

Nusres: What's your name?

Claire: Well duh! Look at me. Don't you know who I am? Im…Im…I don't remember!

Nurse: Oh dear. I'll go get the doctor! Stay calm, we'll figure this out!

Claire: Like, you're damn right you will!

To be continued…"Missing Persons" Part one


	9. Missing Persons

Missing Persons

Milk carton poster child

Morning crept onto the hills of Peaceful Pines. Claire cuddled her knees thinking hard about her situation.

Claire: Like, I know how to figure out who I am! …Hey! Like, where is my purse?

The nurse nearby came in the room with an expression of curiosity.

Nurse: What's the matta shuga?

She picked up the chart at the edge of the bed.

Nurse: Oh you have amnesia.

Claire: I do NOT throw up to loose weight! Why does that say that on there!

Nurse: Calm down shuga, that's bulimia, amnesia is when you don't remember stuff about who you are or something that happened.

Claire: Well, like, I know THAT problem thanks. So anyways, I was like, looking for my purse? Where is my purse? It's a Prauda purse! So it is probably the only one you have in your little, evidence locker or whatever. It has my I.D. in it.

Nurse: Well aren't we just the little sweet princess? Sorry hun, but those things right there is all that was found with you.

Claire glanced to the small tin cart next to her bed. There sat $400, a lipstick stick, her leather stripped dress with fuzzy cape that she wore as queen, and her mirror compact.

Claire: You have to be kidding me, I never leave my Prauda bag…it's Prauda!

Nurse: All you had with you is what you were wearing. Sorry hun. I'm sure we'll find a missing persons report that matches you just sit tight.

The nurse left the room and mumbled something under her breath a little.

Nurse: Although I have my doubts anyone would want you back.

Claire: UGH! This place like, totally smells funny! How long are they going to keep me here? This is like, supposed to be a hospital, I'm not feeling very hospitalized. At least there is a T.V. in here. But of course it's a 19 inch and it like a mile up in the air.

Claire cuddled her knees under the blanket and pouted angrily as she watched basic television.

Meanwhile back on the streets of the new Neither world.

Bj: Man, I can't figure out where anything is around here. What ever has been rebuilt isn't what was there before. WHAT HAPPENED TO THIS PLACE!

Beetlejuice screamed out in frustration on his knees in the intersection of four tall, skinny, and deformed buildings. Suddenly he heard marching coming his way. With no where to hide, he transformed into a striped rat and pretended to nibble on something.

From the darkness of the lamp-lit streets 6 giant muscular monsters wearing matching uniforms marched towards the intersection on their more then tiny legs. Lights turned off and doors locked as the goons passed by.

Bj: What are those guys? I smell rotten cheese here, oh hey, it is rotten cheese. (munch)

Beetlejuice watched the grotesque soldiers split up onto the other streets.

Bj: Apparently there's a new curfew around here. Now where did they come from? I should find Jacques and ask him. I hope the road house is still standing. Now…just have to find it.

The ghoul awkwardly glanced at his surroundings trying to spot the slightest clue to where he was in town.

Bj: PPFFFT! What am I thinking? I'll just float up and get my bearings.

He swiftly glided into the sky. As he turned his head a large row of teeth nearly tore him to shreds. Fear caused the ghost to fall to the cement. Looking up he saw a Sky-worm, but the creature was different then what he had been taught they were like…this one was emitting a lot of smoke from its scales and its glowing red eyes, were the only detail that he could make out, other then its rotting dragon-like wings. Luckily it had not spotted him, or was not interested in him.

Bj: This IS the Neither world right?

(ONK ONK! RRREEAAAOOORRRGGGVRRROOM!)

Beetlejuice turned his attention to the ground shaking noise and was suddenly impaled by a large furry dragster.

Bitey: SQUEE SQUEE!

Doomy backed up and became his regular self as he tried to help his dearest dead friend back to his feet.

Bj: I missed you too, At least you haven't changed. HEY! Do you guys know if the Road house is still in tact?

The two mute friends glanced at each other looking for an answer.

Bj: Didn't think so. My luck. Well, let's search together.

Beetlejuice climbed aboard and the reunited roomies zoomed off into the distance.

Lacey and Samantha walked home from school, not one of them spoke for a good few blocks.

Samantha: So, what's your deal? Why are YOU so quiet?

Lacey: Why are you?

Samantha: I asked first.

Lacey: Well, it's been two years since, that really weird sleep over we had. And since Claire disappeared. Do you think…um-

Samantha: I told you, we had nothing to do with it. We watched zombie movies, and conjured lost spirits, we HAD NOTHING to do with Claire never being found.

Lacey: But, during the conjuring, you said something about her never coming back, what if it went into what we were doing?

The two stopped dead in their tracks as Samantha held Lacey back with one arm.

Lacey: Wha- Woah…

Looking up into the afternoon sky the two friends gazed upon a blood red moon.

Lacey: How pretty.

Samantha: It's more then pretty, it's weird. Its not even dusk, and the moon isn't supposed to be full for another 4 days. We have to look this up.

Lacey: Huh? …oH, yeah..Um, I think the books are at my house.

Samantha: I say we have ourselves an early full moon marathon.

Lacey: That one new were-wolf movie came out yesterday. We can rent it.

Samantha: How did I get so lucky to be paired with the perfect craft sister?

Lacey: You didn't do a spell did you?

Samantha: No spell could get through your cloudy innocence.

They took a left and walked into Lacey's subdivision, Samantha kicked the tire of some jerk's car as he pulled out in front of them.

Lydia and Kyle sat on a hill over looking the town.

Lydia: I'm getting kinda hungry. Wanna go grab a bite?

Kyle: Wait. Just let me finish drawing you in this awesome sky.

Lydia glanced softly into his face as he concentrated on the paper glancing at her every so often. She took her attention away from him for a second as the red moon began to rise above the leaves of the tree Kyle leaned upon

Kyle: I'll never be able to match this orange color in the sky.

Kyle glanced up at her again not noticing her attention on the sky, but instead he began to linger his glare to her soft skin. He began to have a craving in the back of his mind that he didn't fully understand or even notice until she spoke causing him to awkwardly jump back.

Lydia: Does it look good?

Kyle: AH! ..wh-what? Oh, uh, yeah..um, its almost done.

He went back to coloring, and questioning what he was just feeling.

Lydia: Its ok you know.

Kyle looked up at her a bit confused.

Kyle: Um, excuse me?

Lydia: I know we have only been "officially" dating a month, but you are a guy after all, I'm not going to jump off the handle just because I catch you looking at my chest from time to time. Not that I haven't caught you doing it for the last year and a half.

Kyle froze as he stared into her eyes and blushed. His voice then cracked.

Kyle: Uh…um, ok.

Lydia laid her head back in relaxation as she let the wind pull her hair in all directions.

Kyle slowly looked back at her skin, trying to figure out what had his attention last time and caused him to feel whatever it was he was feeling.

Not noticing that a few moments passed by, Lydia cleared her throat softly to get his attention. He looked up a few inches and met his eyes with hers. She gave him a look of hopeless humor.

Lydia: That doesn't mean you can gawk at me all the time.

Quietly he went back to drawing as he tried to hide his blush.

Lydia let out a soft giggle. A giggle, a giggle that she hadn't had since…

Lydia: SO, um, food? Yes?

Before he could say anything Kyle's stomach practically roared at her.

They both looked at each other in surprise, but then just laughed.

She stood up and grabbed his arm helping him to his feet.

They began walking down the hill when suddenly Kyle stopped…grabbing his stomach.

Lydia: You ok?

Kyle took a few paces back and leaned on the tree. Before she could say another word, he began choking, and trying to cough.

Lydia: Kyle? What is it? Kyle? ANSWER ME!

She shook him, and tried patting him on the back. He dropped to his knees as he spit up some chunky blood. His stomach began to make odd sounds as he choked up some more chunky blood. As he bent down to the grass, his irises began to glow a faint yellow as he let out a deep raspy cough and the color faded with out her notice as he breathed in deeply. He reached for her arm and grabbed tight.

Lyida: Kyle, you're..Ow…OW….OW! Kyle let go please!

He began to raise his head, but before he could open his eyes to look at her, a light blue shirt wrapped around his face catching Lydia by surprise.

Endri: Not tonight kid.

He picked Kyle up effortlessly and carried him to the Jeep. Without even looking at her, Endri sped off down the hill.

All Lydia could do was just sit there in shock, trying to sort out what just happened.

Some where, deep in a cave, a man wearing a large fedora-like hat and a trench coat that cuffed around his face at the collar, stood in front of a blazing green fire.

Man: If I can't find you, I'll smoke you out.

He looked up into a hole on the roof of the cavern with a plain view of the red moon.

Man: Perfect. No more hiding my friend. I've been here too long, time to end it.

The man raised his arms and the fire turned purple as his chants echoed into the caverns.

Lacey and Samantha walked out of the video rental store.

Lacey: Sure is getting dark fast.

Samantha: There's something special happening tonight and we need to find out what. Let's hurry to your house.

Lacey: OK … hey, do you think maybe there are some real witches doing something mystical?

Samantha: Possibly something close, but I doubt it's as fairy tale-ish as you make it sound. I'm going to be blunt with you Lacey, whatever it is it's not good in any way.

Lacey: I want to go home now please. I haven't even watched our movie and I'm officially creeped out.

They picked up their pace and took a short cut through the parking lot to the subdivision. Lacey typed in the gate code, and they walked down the street.

Beetlejuice slowly pressed on the brakes as they pulled up to a giant theatre sporting spotlights and red carpets.

Bj: Woah, no wonder this town is dead, everyone's probably here.

Bitey and Doomy could just stare at the lights illuminating the entire night sky.

Beetlejuice took a few steps cautiously to the sidewalk and peered across the street at the limos pulling up. Beetlejuice watched countless celebrities make their appearance and-

Bj: I don't know who a single one of these freaks are. What is this some charity shindig?

A red glittery limo with 90 windows pulled in (eventually).

Beetlejuice transformed into a high class snob so that he could get a closer look.

But who should come traipsing out but-

Bj: GINGER? The FAMOUS Spider? … I think I'm going to be sick.

Somethin fishy is goin on. Whoever can make Ginger famous has to have a BIG DIRTY secret to hide. That secret might be my answer to this riddle.

Beetlejuice transformed into the pelt around a ladies neck as she walked inside.

This is just half the chapter, but I thought I'd give you guys something to read while I finished this chapter.

To be continued…Missing Persons milk carton poster child2


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